Bipolar Support Group

Ok where do I even start. Out of no where my fiancee of twelve years not only broke the news that he had cheated but that he was leaving me to carry on with her. A month or two before that he was in such a deep depression I sincerily thought he was going to try and hurt himself. He would only sit quitely and watch tv. I have only seen him that sad once before. Over the next several months he if he wasn't calling me yelling and screaming and calling me awful things he would call me sobbing uncontrollably into the phone. He took her on vacation, bought her extravagant gifts he could not afford. He has been staying up all night and disappearing at times. He lies constantly and does a lot of other terrible things but maintains that he has not done a thing wrong. Its almost like he feels he is super man and society rules do not count for him. He has absolutely no impulse control. When he was actually allowed to come to my house he would run around it playing loudly with our daughter, something he did not do before. On the way to my house he could be yelling obscenities at me but soon as he sees me he grabs me and kisses me and ask me to get back together with him. He has even started getting really careless with our daughter. Buying exspensive gifts or just ignoring her. Falling asleep while he has her or just not showing up when he says he is. A lot of his behavior makes absolutely no sense. Even his family is looking at him scratching their heads at him. A restraining order and a court order later and outside source , or daughters court appointed lawyer, mentioned that it seems that he is bipolar. Looking back it does seem like every two years or so we have these same exact issues, him flying into rages, sexual promiscuity, lying, forgetting being very careless about everyones feelings around him. does this sound like bipolar disorder?

Hi ksmart29s Welcome to MDJ and a special welcome to the Bipolar Support Group. This group is supportive, encouraging and informative. If you have any questions, please contact me or any one of the other group leaders via personal message (PM).

No one here is qualified to diagnose, treat, or provide professional medical advice. Only a board certified licensed psychiatrist (pdoc) or a licensed psychologist (tdoc) may diagnose under the law. Only psychiatrists (pdocs) may prescribe medications. So, one of the first recommendations I make is that your fiance be referred to see a psychiatrist (pdoc) for a diagnostic evaluation. At that time, the pdoc will make a diagnosis and treatment recommendations, which may include medication and referral to a psychologist (tdoc) for therapy. If the courts are involved, they may be able to order a psychiatric evaluation and to provide relevant history. Otherwise, many psychiatrists ask to include significant others in the interview process, with the patient's written consent, of course.

My heart goes out to you. Your fiance's behavior must be incredibly painful to you and your daughter. I can certainly understand your wanting to find a way to explain it. Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing. We care what happens to you.

We r in the very begining stages. I can't believe I'm using we when right now we aren't even togeether. I am doing prliminary research because I really think at some point my help will be needed. Bipolar explains this over a decade of horrible behavior. So concearned and scared for him.

What's scary is if he resists help or is lax about learning to manage the illness--if he has it. People who are successful seem to share common attributes: self-insight, a willingness to listen to the views of others, the ability to recognize that uncontrolled bipolar is dangerous and destructive, hunger to learn how to recover, a loving support network, patience while a good medication recipe is identified, skill at learning to identify warning signs of mood episodes and take action to head them off, stress management and support from other bipolar people. Also avoidance of drinking and drugs and keeping a regular sleep schedule.

That's not a complete list, but the more of those that are missing, the dimmer the prospects. Some people find their own way, but many fall short and need to be patched back together often.

Certainly has some characteristics, but of course we can't diagnose. If he would see a psychiatrist, he would get a diagnosis. He would have to do this on his own though. Maybe you could mention it to him and he could possible take your advice and do it. Sometimes people just don't see it in themselves though and they go years without treatment. I'm sorry he sometimes ignores your daughter and is being careless with her. You will want to know that she is in safe hands. I hope that something comes from this and he does seek help because there is something going on with him and his moods in my opinion. I hope you get the answers soon. There is a lot of support here and you will learn a lot about bipolar if you read through the discussions. Welcome to the group!

I've been there where I was suffocated by a boyfriend. They always want to be with you every second of the day. It's awful. I know exactly what you are talking about. I'm sorry he is so insecure. You do need time to yourself and so does he. It's healthy to have time alone. You may have to be stern in this for some alone time. He shouldn't be making you feel guilty. Tell him how you feel. I hope you get some space soon.