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03/04/2011 10:01 PM

relocation for work

xaos
Posts: 2
Member

I was diagnosed BP1 1.5 years ago after my first break and moved from CA to recover with my family in NC. I recovered very quickly and found another job in CA and moved back to start working. Like an idiot, I stopped taking my meds because I didn't think I was really BP and almost exactly a year later I had another break only this time it was worse. So again I moved back home to recover.

Now I've been through a great program that educates as well as medicates and I now understand that I have to take meds for the rest of my life. Now I have fully recovered and am searching for jobs again. The problem is that my specialty seems to be concentrated in metropolitan areas which are higher stress environments and there is nothing near my family.

One of my friends who knows I'm BP heard I was thinking of relocating again for work and basically called me a moron and said she wouldn't be a part of my life anymore. That I should "accept" my condition.

I'm curious if anyone else has ever been in this position. Part of me is afraid to leave my family's support. That if I go somewhere else it's just gonna happen again and I'll have to move back and be in a worse place. The other part of me is hopeful that I can continue to live a somewhat normal life. I know I will have to do things differently like not drinking alcohol, eating well, exercising, maintaining a support network, etc. I'm also afraid of government healthcare or career change as I have other more expensive health problems.

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03/04/2011 10:54 PM
Zin

Hmmm...it sounds to me like your friend is really scared for you!

I had to go onto disability for my bipolar, so I can't really help with the job relocation; however, I think it's up to you as to whether you relocate for another job or not! The fact that you're still up for working is fantastic!!! Maybe if you can find a place that's within driving distance of your family. Maybe you could go home on the weekends or once or twice a month! That might help, if you're not sure, yet, about leaving. Just take a few 'baby' steps to see how you react. And I can tell you from my short experience with this group...they will be here for you! They're human...like all of us, and have their bad days, their furious days and their amazing days. And through all of it...they care, forgive, forget and love.

I'm sorry I can't offer any more suggestions.

Welcome to the group!

Zin


03/04/2011 11:48 PM
Joy75
Joy75  
Posts: 16593
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

That's harsh of your friend to say that she won't be a part of your life anymore. I think probably you would have been okay if you hadn't gone off of your medications. It's too bad that you can't find a job close to your family. You have to work though. I wish you the best in whatever you decide to do. I think you are taking a positive step in the right direction accepting that you will have to take medications for the rest of your life. That is a big step for you. We are always going to be here for you too, so you always have us to turn to. Welcome to the group!!

03/04/2011 11:58 PM
youngfilly
youngfilly  
Posts: 3068
VIP Member

Hi Xaos,

I have just relocated for work which I have done a few times before. I wont lie, it is tough and you miss your comfort zone. Personally I feel that if you keep taking your meds and find a Dr in your new area that you can trust, you will be ok. You will always be able to call your family and as suggested previously you can go visit them as often as you can. You will also create a new support base in your new area. And there is always us Smile

At the end of the day it is your call but I think from personal experience you will be ok


03/05/2011 04:54 AM
momto4boys
momto4boys  
Posts: 60
Member

First, welcome to the group.

As others have said, you have to do what is best for you. I think if you can get something somewhat close to your family, where you can travel on the weekends to see them that it may help you. Also, you have to remember when you moved back to CA you were unmedicated. Now that you are medicated and doing well you are less likely to have the same thing happen again. Good luck with whatever you decide. We'll all be here when you need us.


03/05/2011 05:52 AM
bpjourney
bpjourney  
Posts: 484
Member

Welcome to the group xaos!!! I can certainly understand that you have a hard choice to make. Especially considering what has happened in the past. However, it sounds like you are much healthier now and since you know now that you need your meds you will probably do very well. Smile You can make great effort to stay in close touch with you family (support system). I know it's never the same as having them right there, but maybe a bit of independence would be good for you as well. I use video chatting to stay in touch with my out of town family. It's the next best thing to having them in the room with me. You can also lean on us for anything you need!!! Feel free to come here for support, venting, sharing your experiences, etc... This is an amazing group of people who truly care and come from all different backgrounds!

Best of luck with whatever you decide to do!

Post edited by: bpjourney, at: 03/05/2011 05:54 AM


03/05/2011 06:25 AM
uppitywoman
uppitywoman  
Posts: 42707
VIP Member
I'm an Advocate

Welcome to the group, xaos. First of all, you made the all important discovery that you can never go off your meds and you will never do it again. That alone will help keep what happened from repeating. As others have suggested, perhaps trying to find something as near as possible to home would be the best course of action so you could make frequent visits home. Finding a good psychiatric and therapist wherever you may end up would be a big help as well as finding a support group, which in a city would probably be possible. You could get skype to see your family, too. This a fantastic support group and we will be here for you as well so you won't be alone wherever you go. The decision is yours, but know that if you go away from your family there are ways to find support to help you stay grounded.

03/05/2011 06:48 AM
TeriNY

Xaos,

Welcome, it's great to hear that you are at a point where you are considering working again, sorry that it's not available anywhere near your family - Could a compromise be that you move somewhere closer than CA?? perhaps Charlotte or even DC? Hope you are able to figure this out. I don't live near my family and had to rely on my unsupportive husband... until I found MDJ and I thank God that I did. The members here are wonderful and GL really care. Hope you continue to post!!


03/05/2011 08:37 AM
xaos
Posts: 2
Member

Thank you for your warm welcomes and replies Smile I am learning that there are ways of finding support outside of my family which I know will be critical should I have to move away.
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