Bipolar Support Group

I’ve been on Lamictal 100mg for little over a month and truth be told, I have no idea how I’m supposed to be feeling. I know you’re supposed to feel “normal” as in not manic or depressed, but I honestly can’t remember feeling “normal”, I’ve always felt depressed (or manic when it happens), even on my good days for as long as I can remember, even before the diagnosis and the mania. When I see my pdoc in a month, I’m going to talk to her about it then, but she’s really hasty about adding additional drugs yet.

I have this overwhelming feeling that it’s just in my nature to have a “depressed” personality and it’s not really anything substantial. Do you go back to your “normal personality” when the drugs work? I ask because early today I was bouncing about my room and car to techno feeling manic but it didn’t last long and just confused to a whole other level.

I wonder the same thing you're wondering...about feeling "normal". I like what Miss Hildy says.

Hi kelseymarches, your question is a good one indeed. After I was diagnosed bipolar and started treatment with meds and therapy I was then diagnosed with dysthymia, a chronic low grade depression.

http://www.psychologyinfo.com/depression/dysthymic.htm

Once I learned a bit about it I understood why I felt the way I had for so long. I have hypomania from time to time and that's when I feel the best but then there's usually a crash so now I strive to be more balanced. For me that's not too high and not too low.

When I went back on my meds after a 4.5 year break that I had implimented because I had lost my health insurance and couldn't afford the medication, it took me a month to see the manic go away. One big indicator for me was the people in my life, both co workers and family. They noticed that I was more focused and wasn't running at 100mph. I still have a high or low period every now and then but they are very infreequent. It might take a while for you to settle to that balanced area but it will eventually happen withthe right combination of medication.

I would say to enjoy the normal feeling even though you don't know what it is. It will probably take some getting used to since you have been so depressed for so long. I spend my entire life being depressed. Lamictal itself didn't take care of it for me, but it did help. I hope you start to enjoy this feeling. Hang in there and take it slowly.