Bipolar Support Group

i have had a really crappy week. monday i got my period (i know not everyone wants to know that, but it's what seemed to start everything), my back was killing me all day, i felt sick and weak and nasty, snapped at my husband. tuesday was not much better, than wednesday i had a root canal done that took 2 flippin hours and the dentist kept hitting nerves that weren't numb because i had a lot of inflamation (that's what he said anyway). so i took the rest of the day off, the pain meds made me so frickin sick, i could barely move. i couldn't go to school, i'm still really upset about that. i emailed some other students in the class, hopefully someone will tell me what i missed. i feel very pessimistic and stressed out. my husband tried to find a pdoc for me last week, either they are not taking new patients, or they will not talk to him, they say i have to call and set up an appointment. one doctor said they wouldn't diagnose me, i had to give them the name of the doctor that diagnosed me in GEORGIA, 3 YEARS AGO! like i can remember that or just have that crap floating around my house! i'm so sorry i'm not meticulously organized. everything seems to be annoying the heck outta me, and i'm getting paranoid?? i don't know if that's the right word or feeling. i was convinced earlier today that my boss was mad at me, i kept thinking, what did i do wrong?? i went in yesterday after my root canal and she told me to go home! then later i realized she was never mad at me, i just made that up in my head. i feel crazy.

can someone just tell me it will be okay??

thx

zov

Post edited by: zovjraar, at: 11/29/2007 19:55

Hello,

You be fine. You seem to have alot going on. May I suggest hanging in there for s short time and get that pdoc apt. God bless you.

My son thought I was mad at him the other day, and I was not even anywhere close to being mad at him, I was a little preoccupied when we talked on the phone, and I probably wasn't as supportive with him and I usually try to be, and he inferred from that that I was mad at him, his wife called me back to chat with me, I think to find out if I was acting mad, and he told me later he thought I was mad at him during that conversation. It's the illness that translates regular conversations into negative experiences. I'm sure no one is mad at you, it's just your mind lying to you again.

zovjraar - ((HUGS)) I'm sorry you are having such a bad week..Sounds like a very bad week!!Hopefully, you got all the bad stuff outta the way this week. You will be ok!!You definitely need to get that pdoc started up..I'm sure you are frustrated!I'm sure you are also freaked out about even thinking of calling..When I call Dr. offices, tons of things run thru my head what I 'think' they are thinking about me..

I agree, i bet your boss was not mad, they knew you didnt feel good and hated to see you in pain, when you needed your rest!!

I hope you are feeling better, hope you days are looking up..

Bleah...sounds like a rotten week. Don't worry. Things will get better. Every little thing is going to be all right. Make that appt. I know it is a little on the scary side but with those new privacy laws, your hubby can't talk to them without your permission. So you could have your hubster call them and say, "Here is my wife. She's going to give you permission to talk to me." Then you get on and they say, "Do we have your permission to talk to your husband?" You say yes and hand the phone back to your husband so he can make the appt and explain what is going on. That is what I had to do. I couldn't manage the call on my own but I could say, "yes" into the phone. So I did that.

I hate it when I feel like people are mad at me when they are not or like they can't stand me or something. Then I have to go over everything I said to that person and make sure I didn't say something stupid. Invariably, I find SOMETHING that could be considered offensive or something and then whammo--i am all down on myself and trying to figure out how to make things right. When I do, the person usually doesn't even remember that I said that or if they did, they weren't offended. I have to remember what Dr. Suess said. Say what you feel because the people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind.

Anyway...Hugs to you. May it look up soon. Peace, peach

thank you guys so much!! it makes me feel better to know that i'm not out of my head (even though that's how i feel!!). i'm still feeling really icky and not myself, i kept trying to tell myself to call some of those docs today (even though they're probably closed), and i just could not do it... i just got stressed out and panicky every time i thought about it. peach, that is a great suggestion, i think i may try that, i feel like such an idiot for not being able to talk on the stupid phone... many times before i have dialed the number and then hung up, like in a date movie!! i feel like i'm making everyone miserable, it's actually taking a lot to even post tonight... i know you all don't hate me, i know it's just me, so that's the only reason i'm going through with it! i feel jittery and tense but unmotivated at the same time??

and some of my classmates told me i didn't miss anything on wednesday, that's a load off! i'm so glad they answered!

just last week i was saying how this is favorite time of year and i'm always okay during the holidays and now i've made myself a liar!! sometimes i wish i could kick my own butt...

i know this will go away, i keep telling myself that, but man, while it's here, it's so hard to do the every day things! i just feel very torn, i feel happy, but sad, or i'm lonely, but i don't want to be around people. i hope things will start looking up next week! maybe something really good will happen and that will pull me out of it.

thank you all again! here's to HOPE!!

Sorry you're having to go through all of this, I can't relate to how you feel when your a bp person, so I am just going to send you happy thoughts and hope they cross over some invisible line here - I wish so bad I could make this horrible disease disappear from the face of the earth - it is so unfair - anyway, just know that I care and that I'm sorry. (((hugs)))