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Bipolar ForumsGeneral & SupportFeeling like a fake
05/20/2010 10:05 PM
pinnacle4
 
Posts: 108
Member

So often I feel like what I present to people is so far away from the lazy person I really am. I'm energetic all day, then come home and all I want to do is chill. Even when I'm feeling good, I have this emptiness. Do any of you have success with counseling? I haven't been very successful with this.
Reply

05/21/2010 03:08 AM  Top
WTF
WTF
 
Posts: 1544
Senior Member

I havent been overly successful with counseling either, but i think i know why. I just dont know how to combat it. I find counselors are great or horrible. If there horrible and go through the standard questions like "how are you feeling", "how does that make you feel", then i tend to get irritated. If they are great and actually get into me head then they are usually too great and get so far into my head i get scared. I dunno i guess i truly am my own worst enemy.
The storm starts when the drops start dropping. When the drops stop dropping then the storm starts stopping.
-Dr. Seuss

05/21/2010 03:34 AM  Top
DonnaLynne

Pinnacle, I think therapy is great for incentive, but we as a group understand each other comletely inwardly.

Terrets people have to hold their tics in all day, so when they come home to rest, there isn't any. They are ticing all over the place.

We suppress ourselves to look normal to the outside world, that is a very strenuous thing to do, at least you are going out!!!!

By the time you come home of course you are exhausted.

Don't look thru the eyes of the normal chemistry brain, look thru ours.

You have moved mountains, and you are a fake to present yourself to others in a way that does not need their pity, bravo to you.

You are very real.

And you don't need to use words to put yourself down, how about words that boost you up.

You are brave, confronting a world that doesn't understand,

you are strong, being active in that world

you are courageous, for doing anything with that world.

Bless you,

you are my hero for the day!

wolf


05/21/2010 07:29 AM  Top
Joy75
Joy75
 
Posts: 15645
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

I think a lot of people are energetic during the day to come home and chill. I don't know about the emptiness. It could be from settling down. I am not seeing a therapist at this moment, but am looking for one. I strongly believe that therapist help people in one way or another. You get to get things out in the open and suggestions to overcome them. Do you let yourself open up fully, or do you keep some inside. I'm fake all the time regarding showing people how I really feel. Well, unless I'm irritable, that's kind of hard to disguise with me. I hope you gain some insight and feel less empty in time. Hugs
Joy, 37 years old

Blog:

http://www.joylepley.blogspot.com

Email:

simplyjoyful75@gmail.com

Bipolar type 2 and ADD

300mg Wellbutrin
200mg Lamictal
40mg Viibryd
15mg Abilify

I AM NEITHER A PSYCHIATRIST OR PSYCHOLOGIST. I AM HERE FOR THE SAME REASONS YOU ARE. TO GIVE AND RECEIVE SUPPORT. WHAT I SAY IS PURELY MY OPINION. PLEASE CONTACT YOUR DOCTOR FOR MEDICAL ADVICE.

Bipolar disorder can be a great teacher. It’s a challenge, but it can set you up to be able to do almost anything else in your life. – Carrie Fisher

05/21/2010 07:46 AM  Top
ApRiLGeTsAngry77

I think counseling helps if you are honest and open to the counseler. I have not had the opportunity to have counseling but I am doing some Dbt work online.

I really would love to do dbt work but I can not afford it and the sliding scale place told me that I do not need it. I wish you the best and hope that you find something that works with you.


05/21/2010 12:47 PM  Top
marisaH
marisaHPosts: 354
Member

I have been in therapy for 2 and 1/2 years and it has been a lifesaver for me. I have learned so many coping skills that really help me deal with life and this disorder. I think that finding the right therapist is the key.
Marisa

05/21/2010 01:26 PM  Top
FriedBrainNuggets
FriedBrainNuggets
 
Posts: 758
Member

i'm anti therapy other than coping skills and some self esteem boosters but then i really dont want anyone in my head, its a scary place
bipolar 1
geodon 160 mg at bed
effexor 75 mg in am
klonopin as needed up to 5mg
use marijuana in place of klonopin

05/22/2010 07:53 AM  Top
pinnacle4
 
Posts: 108
Member

Thank you everyone for your insights. It is wonderful how everyone comes from a different place and with different perspectives yet we share the same illnes.

05/22/2010 08:25 AM  Top
santos63
santos63
 
Posts: 2524
Senior Member

I think the emptiness is a symptom of being exhausted.

I never have learned to trust therapist, because I know they talk to my pdoc. (the info is on my chart and pdoc can look at it at anytime). I love my pdoc and don't hide anything from him. I just don't trust people very often. Plus what I say is left open to a therapist"s interpretation which may or may not be accurate. I would just rather tell my pdoc how I feel. It's not like a therapist can or will tell you what to do.

Live in Perfect Love!
~Ana~
I worked as a RN, since 1993, I do not practice at present and my opinions are exactly that - opinions. Do not take any advice that I may offer as medical treatment. I will always defer treatments, etc to your MD, Pdoc, and/or pharmacist. What I share with you are my personal experiences, and basic knowledge that I learned as a nurse.
I have Diabetes, Bipolar Disorder with psychotic features and mixed, Fibromyalgia, Arthritis, and Chronic Low Back Pain with bulging discs in back and neck, Asthma, Hypothyroidism, Arthritis in lumbar and sacral areas, lumbar disc displacement, Degeneration of lumbar intervertebral discs, Lumbosacral radiculitis, DJD

Previous discussions I participated in:
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05/22/2010 08:40 AM  Top
CynthiaJ

Like you, I often want to come home and "chill" because I am exhausted after working all day and having to present a happy face to the world. I have had my problems with therapists but, I believe in the process of therapy. I just started with someone new and I believe that she will be able to help get inside my own head and figure out how to help myself. I hope you find what you are looking for. I am on the same road as you. It's not easy, but I think that we will get there. Feel free to p.m. me.

~Cynthia

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