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piedlourd
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so i was sitting counting my fingers and the idea of relationships bubbled through the muck in my brain. background: i've been divorced 4.5 years now and the main reason was my erratic behaviour, about a year after i was finally diagnosed and things started turning around. i met a women in a support group i was involved in and that was a disaster mainly because she wouldn't take her meds regularly. since that i have stayed away from any potential relationships for a couple of reasons. first, i always wonder if i ready but how can i know . . . second, what if this other person isn't, well, open minded because i still have my moments of weirdness. third is it fair to ask someone to be in a relationship with me. all this could of course boil down to me being afraid of rejection of whatever. just wondered if this rings true for anyone else. If I could be anything in the world,
I would be everything.
If I could think of anything in the world,
I would think of future failures.
If I could touch anything in the world,
I would cradle my infant self.
If I could dream of anything in the world,
I would dream my dreams real.
Now that I am something and I’ve thought, touched, and dreamed,
I will let it all go
- Charles R. Jackson |
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bejeweled
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Terry I can only speak for myself. But I have had disasterous relationships. And with everything that Katy and I have gone thru I still wouldn't trade the relationship for another one. (I might for $50 million but that has yet to be tested.) Finding someone who accepts you is tough. It is possible, but you have to be open to it. I never thought I would be comfortable with someone else and able to be myself. She didn't either. But here we are. We have made it thru unbelivable hardships together. And have accomplished alot in spite of ourselves. You have delighted us long enough.
- Jane Austen
Do or do not. There is no try. -YODA
"Someone call the doctor, got a case of love bipolar. Stuck on a roller coster and can't get off this ride."
-Kate Perry Hot & Cold. |
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armymom8486
Posts: 1271
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Terry, I had those same feelings in the past. But just know you deserve to have someone in your life. When I met my husband neither one of us was to sure of anything. He is now my bestfriend and I wouldn't trade him for the world. He has taken the time to learn about my disease and try to understand it. He now supports me emotionally for the most part and finacially. You will and you deserve to have someone in your life. I really hope you find the best. With all my heart, Jeanne |
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debiski
Posts: 1605
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I was dx'd AFTER I got married, but my husband has stuck it out with me and I wouldn't trade him. He is my best friend and supports me both emotionally and financially (well, I get SSDI, but it ain't much!). Sometimes he just has to back off if I'm having a "moment", but he doesn't let it upset him and we go on. He doesn't truly understand what I'm going through, but he accepts it. So you see, it IS possible! Deb A heretic is a man who sees with his own eyes. -Gotthold Ephraim
~Deb |
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jritchie
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Terry, I felt the same way, especially after being rejected by someone who 'couldn't handle the drama'. Asshole. Anyway, no dating for quite a while. Then this guy started stopping in my office almost everyday. Very persistant. Didn't ask me out, we just became friends. Finally after 6 months! he asked me out. We've be together ever since. He's very understanding about the whole BP thing and reminds me to take my meds. I'm still scared. VEry scared. But I want a relationship, I was tired of being lonely. Sometimes you gotta take a risk. J-ROCK, it ain't AM, it ain't FM, she's BP all the way!
Meds:
Trileptal 1200 Mg
Geodon 40 Mg
Lexapro 20 Mg
Wellbutron XL 300 Mg
Topomax 50 Mg
Concerta 36 Mg
Klonopin .5 Mg as needed |
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TerriTee
Posts: 1785
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Terry, When you meet the right person, things will work out. I love my husband for all the things that make him who he is. His bipolar is just one aspect of him, and we all have things to deal with. When you are ready, take a chance. It might be worth it  Most people don't know that there are angels whose only job is to make sure you don't get too comfortable & fall asleep & miss your life - Brian Andreas  |
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piedlourd
Posts: 1443
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risk, risk, risk. that's the big one for me. putting myself on the line a bit. it's a lot safer keeping the doors closed as lessons of life have taught me well. the other element is that i'm still unsure about my own stability. i've been well for quite awhile but i'm cautious about it, stress and all that. i have the ultimate excuse anyway: my 12 year old daughter has forbidden from having girlfriend and she wouldn't like her if i did i wish i could be more like my daughter. thanks all for the encouragement - maybe i need a good kick in the ass. terry If I could be anything in the world,
I would be everything.
If I could think of anything in the world,
I would think of future failures.
If I could touch anything in the world,
I would cradle my infant self.
If I could dream of anything in the world,
I would dream my dreams real.
Now that I am something and I’ve thought, touched, and dreamed,
I will let it all go
- Charles R. Jackson |
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jritchie
Posts: 4123
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Terry, it'll happen when it happens...I wasn't even looking, and believe me, this guy had to work at it LOL. You seem like a great guy, the BP is just a little part of us. J-ROCK, it ain't AM, it ain't FM, she's BP all the way!
Meds:
Trileptal 1200 Mg
Geodon 40 Mg
Lexapro 20 Mg
Wellbutron XL 300 Mg
Topomax 50 Mg
Concerta 36 Mg
Klonopin .5 Mg as needed |
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keepthefaith
 Posts: 486
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Terry, I'm glad to see that everyone is in agreement. We all deserve to find a special person to be with. Karen was up front with her disorder. She told me about it on our first or second date. And here we are, 20 years later, more in love than when we first met. But the key was, she was honest about it. If she had tried to hide her disorder, then when things got rough, I might have felt differently about staying, but I knew what I was getting into, and was determined to wait it out. And there were some rough times. Not rough times like I hear so many of my friends talk about, anger and abuse and hate. Just the few moments of instability that were difficult, for Karen, our kids and me. But the other 98% of the time have been just what you hope for in a relationship. What if she didn't want to take the chance? Or I didn't? Look at what we would have missed out on. Now we just gotta get thru these years with TEENAGERS!!!!!!! Now that's ROUGH! So, don't be afraid. Just be honest and be yourself. Paul |
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