Bipolar Support Group

I can't answer that one. I pushed them all away. I chose men that were unhealthy for me by trying to recreate my family of origin.

Now, I'm a lot less codependent on others and enjoy my own company, I'd like to have a s/o to experience that loving intimate relationship which is more than the physical and moves into the spiritual.

I hope there's a positive answer for you somewhere or from someone on this post.

MsBimbo

For me, when I was betweeen cycles, I could tell that people really did love me, and care for me. That just made me afraid for them though. It was, and still is, incredibly hard to allow someone to be close. Sometimes it is a feeling of being undeserving because of the things that I've done/did/might do again, and sometimes it is fear that they'll get hurt, emotionally or physically, by being close to me.

It gets easier as treatment progresses, and things start to level out, but somehow I don't really think it'll ever go away fully.

My wife and I have been married for 3 months now and about two weeks ago she said she did not love me and is now staying with her mom. Her mom says this is what she has always done she gets close and then push you away. I think no hope it is the BP that makes her do this it is the only thing I have to hold on to. She has said she does not want to feel this way but she can't help it. I really don't know what to tell you. I am in a bad spot myself and am looking for anwsers. I just know I am not going to walk away from this and maybe you shouldn't either. I mean if you turly love this gal then the first thing you need to do and it seem like you are tring is to learn about BP. That is what I am doing. I wish you the best my friend... Just know you are not alone..........

thank you for your posts. it keeps me going and reminding me why i am doing this.

Hi,

I relate to this topic, because, I am experiencing this, right now. I am Bipolar, and I have to get my space from people sometimes. I get very sensitive, and overwhelmed by others feeling, and problems. I can be there for others most of the time, but, sometimes, I get so, overwhelmed, I need my space to get my priorities straight. I have also had a fear of getting too dependent on others, and a fear of intimacy. I like being independent, and I like having my own space, sometimes. I don't have a lot of close friendships, and I have a relationship, and 4 kids, and 4 pets. Even when I am home with everyione I have a hard time, sometimes. I get overwhelmed by crowds, and can't go to the mall, or fairs, without having anxiety attacks.

I had a very busy day, yesterday, driving to errands, and taking my bf to the emergency room, and doing other stuff,that was very stressful and I am having to take time out today, to destress. I get so overwhelmed, I need to get to a quiet place, a safe place to calm down, and relax.

So, For me I push people away for all kinds of reasons. But, now, I can communicate why, I need my space. I used to just dissappear, or make it the other persons fault. I also, used to not beable to have a committed relationship, because, I would get clausterphobic, especially if someone chased me. I couldn't commit, because it would threaten my manic life style. Or I would get depressed, and not, want to be around anyone. It is really hard for people who aren't bipolar to understand my bipolar behavior. I can be very nerotic.

The anger, the snapping, the running away, the hiding out for days at a time, the nervousness around crowds, and the psychosis, which just makes it all worse. When I was young and in my disorder, I didn't really care about others. I was oblivious. I depended on others for love and support, and friendship, but, was inconsistant with my own ability to give it back.

If a bipolar person isn't on meds or getting help, it is really hard to have a peaceful relationship with them. Even on meds, I can still have this behavior, but, not as extreme. Without meds, and therapy, and the help, I am getting, I was insane, my disorder, would take over, and I was avoiding everyone, and wanting to runaway from home, and was swinging to being suicidal and hearing voices, and all my behavior came out at my boyfriend. I am on meds now, and have been going therapy so, I can deal with these issues, in a better way.My life has really improved, lately, and my relationship has, too.So, I hope this helps, Thanks, Gypsy

This sounds so much like my wife. I wish she was to the point that she could see the problem. It's like she sees only the depression side as the bad part and the manic side as her "normal". So I am not sure how to make her see that both sides are the problem. What was it that made you see this gypsy? Her social worker tells me she is bipolar but she has not told my wife this. She want my wife to go to the UNI adult psychiatry department and hear it from them. So I set her up an appointment but my wife does not want me to go. I feel that if I am not there to fill in the blanks that she will undoubtly leave out then they will only see the depression. Because she thinks that is the trouble and does not talk about the manic side because that is "normal" to her. Should I just show up and risk her walking out? I am tring to do what I feel any good husband would do. But it is hard to think or look at things the way she does. She has a way of making you start second guessing yourself and that makes it hard to know what to do as well. Any insight would be helpful at this point.

Hotrod is there any way you could ring them and tell them you believe she has manic episodes? My doctor reccommended i ring my exs doctors to tell him. just an idea x

Hey Hotrod, calling them or stopping by and maybe having a word with the doctor is also a good way to do it, and that way she never has to know that you were involved, later when she is on medication and doing better you can tell her if you think that she would want to know and can accept it, I've had to do that with my mom, and my husband, neither of them have this illness, they just fail to tell the truth of what is going on when they are at the doctors.

Carmen

Spoke with wife today (sorry future ex wife). She said she wouldnt come home but she kept saying that she was afraid it would fall apart again. I am beginning to think that she is afraid of hurting me and our son if she came back. In her mind she is doing us a favor. I just cannot get her to understand she is destroying an irreplacable part of our son. She now has a girlfriend as well as a boyfriend. Well this guy has been pursuing her activly for 6 years and now he got her. Hope he enjoys rollercoasters. She is pushing me and her son away from her. I still sent her roses today. Unfortunately she also told me she regrets having our children since she put them thru hell.

I thought I was the only one, I have been running all my life.