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02/19/2012 04:26 PM

new member - mixed emotions(page 2)

marielynn
Posts: 190
Member

Sorry you are going through this. My husband of all most 20 years is also bipolar but has decided he doesn't want to take meds. 2 1/2 years ago I had him committed to the mental health unit for 3 weeks. He was court ordered to take the meds and quit them soon after the court was done. He then went about 2 years and went extremely manic. On Monday he was hugging me, sobbing, that he loved me and we would make it through all of this and by Thursday he disappeared and had been seeing another woman. He lived with her for about 4 months and now lives with his mom. I filed for divorce on Nov. 1st and it will be final on May 7th. I still really love my husband, but once again I helped him get the meds and brings his mania down and then he once again quits taking him. When I got him into the psych doctor he told me I saved his life, etc. We also have a 16 year old bipolar son. My life is a real struggle, but my 16 year takes his meds so he is willing to accept the bipolar. Hope things get better for you.
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02/19/2012 04:50 PM
fullohope
fullohopePosts: 14
New Member

SadDee, I'm sorry to hear about your divorce and wish for you and your son a more peaceful and sane life from here on out. And Marielynn, I'm sorry to hear about your struggles. Sounds like you've had and have a lot of challenges to face. Reading all these stories is showing me the extent of the damage done by bp and also introducing me to a lot of patient and giving people.

Post edited by: fullohope, at: 02/19/2012 04:56 PM


02/19/2012 06:24 PM
recovering4love
recovering4love  
Posts: 124
Member

SadDee it must be hard, I wonder at how you have come to an end, I wonder if that is why I am here or am I trying to find that one thing or pill. Or figure out what has happened...I've speculated the EXP-Bp can be treatment resistant, but not been able yet to properly label that ...that is why I am here I suppose.

02/19/2012 06:44 PM
recovering4love
recovering4love  
Posts: 124
Member

Fullohope I can say with confidence that a Product called True Hope has greatly help her mood swings...she quit taking it because she was feeling so much better but you know how that goes...anyway I believe it is real...also to help the mind she is trying Prevagen made with jellyfish, my sister introduced it to us and it has helped her have a clearer mind...she is able to handle more than she normally does. She was on lamictal for some time and seroquel but they made her feel drugged for sure...this True Hope thing..I was skeptical but it is working...like night and day. She has not had a Manic exacerbation for five years now. It is obvious when she stops taking it...there are no side effects for her or that I even know of for the products.

02/20/2012 06:11 AM
fullohope
fullohopePosts: 14
New Member

recovering4love, thanks for the tip on True Hope. Sounds too good to be true, but I'm open to it and I bet he will be too.

02/20/2012 09:34 AM
SadDee
Posts: 134
Member

Thank you. Even today, after all of the ups and downs, I feel sadness for my situation and wish the outcome had been different. I feel that every time my husband dashed my hopes of a "normal" life, he killed a little part of me each time. When the anger and hate (yes hate) for his actions overwhelmed the love, I knew it was over. I could not continue to love and have hope, to have it dashed nearly the next day with some dangerously selfish act. When I came home to see my 7 year old son taking care of my drunk adult husband time and time again...it was over.

I can't let him rob my son of his childhood. Believe me, I weighed the harm of divorce vs. the harm of his bp and substance abuse, and decided (after much counseling) that divorce was best for my son. I've asked myself many times, why couldn't I have just marry an accountant re: a nice stable man?


02/20/2012 09:49 AM
SadDee
Posts: 134
Member

Recovering4love

My husband didn't get "bad" until 2 years ago, and he's 43. He has always struggled w depression, but nothing like the ups and downs he goes through now. He cycles about every week or two, with little or no time in between. It has gotten unbearably worse. It is dangerous experience after dangerous experience, and enough is enough. He is still at home w us, and doesn't know the full extent (because he is clueless) of his actions. I am just tired of explaining it to him over and over again. Whatever he does when I'm gone, sorry to say, is his own concern now.

I want to wait until after Friday (son's bday) and then when my husband is out of the house we are leaving. I have been told this would be safest, because he is unstable and can be dangerous. Paperwork in order, just waiting for the "escape". Fortunately, I am financially stable on my own, which I know a lot of people are not. If he gets violent, of course, I would leave sooner or call the police (trying to avoid that for my son's sake). After 18 years, I think I can wait a week until after bday. I can honestly say, I've given it my all. I always thought he would change, but he never did, no matter what promises were made and how many tears were shed. Time for me to give up.


02/20/2012 10:10 AM
brokenhrt001
brokenhrt001  
Posts: 119
Member

SadDee

I am sorry to hear about your husband, I can relate to your promblem but my husband doesnt drink that much he loves the bars My husband also started getting worse when he turned 40 and every one said mid life crises well i didnt know what was wrong with him for years until 2years ago and he is cheating more and anger so i left him 3 mon ago and I have been trying to help him but he said its me i need help not him and i wanted to go to marriage counseling and he said NO i also have tried for 13 years and he says it me that needs help. take care of your self and your son


02/20/2012 03:56 PM
SadDee
Posts: 134
Member

Yikes, what a jerk (no offense). Of course it's him! Nothing but him! It is hard enough to help someone who wants to change, if they don't want to change...forget it. A lifetime of frustration awaits you. Do you have children?

02/20/2012 07:47 PM
livinginablender
livinginablender  
Posts: 13320
Group Leader

fullohope

I am concerned for your safety.

Take this test :

http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/MOSAIC-Gavin-de-Beckers- Online-Threat-Assessment-Tool

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