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02/27/2012 06:29 PM

i'm new: i'm lost and i need advice :((page 2)

Posts: 11

liaz, I wish I had known that my husband was BP before we were married with four children. I would have ran as far and as fast away from him as possible. I can not imagine ever knowingly getting involved with someone who has BP. It's just asking for a crazy rollercoaster messed up, miserable life. And you'd never want to have children with him because it would be so hard on them. I feel so bad for what my kids go through because of there dad. Please don't consider staying with him. He may seem fine, but you will never have the loving relationship you want with him. My husband is on meds, and he's still an ass, it doesn't matter, on or off meds, he's not a nice guy and I doubt he ever will be. He's going to have electric convulsive therapy soon, and if that doesn't work I'm filing for divorce. I've lived 14yrs of hell and I'm so tired of it. I'd hate for you to be feeling this way years from now.

You are probably a codependent person, I am, and I'm in a group for codependents, I've even been through codependency treatment. If you don't know what it means, it is people who are always trying to fix people and are people pleasers. Please think seriously about walking away from this relationship before you get anymore involved.

i wish someone had told me this before I got married.

Good luck, I hope you make the right decisions and don't worry about hurting his feelings. That's another part of codependency, we never want to hurt anyone's feelings. We can't control anything but ourselves.

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.Smile


04/22/2012 07:27 PM
Posts: 5

hey! I'm in a serious relationship with him now :/ he seems so normal, he does has his episodes but they dont last longer than 10 15 days, he's such a romantic guy, i dont know how to leave him now, we are so much in love. we get eachother so well, i would hate myself if i hurt him now Sad He's only on Epilim right now, doesn't take any other meds. He was given the injections when he was going through his manic episode in February. He knows when he's going thru all that. I don't know what to do now, why is everything getting so confusing. He really loves me and i dont see anything wrong between us. Please tell me what to do

04/23/2012 11:01 AM
Posts: 67

If you're still following this thread, my dear, here's some advice:

I just terminated a pregnancy. My bipolar ex ran away, and made up lies to justify his decision, instead of admitting he was scared to be a father again. He has 2 grown girls from a previous marriage.

I am devastated. I dont know if I can ever trust again. I dont believe I deserve children again, or a happy future, for what I have done.

Right now things look bleak...but at least I know he is OUT of my life for good, and I will hurt no more from him. And one day I hope to be happy again.

04/24/2012 12:21 PM
Posts: 707
Senior Member

Ten to fifteen days?

Episodes? in multiples?

This is not healthy Liaz.

If you don't see anything wrong "between" you...there may not be anything wrong with the relationship. But if he is still having times of mania (episodes) and they are lasting that long....He is in need of therapy, meds, and support.

And NO ONE should be telling you what to do here, this is your life. We each have the unique opportunity to make our own educated choices.

I hope the best for you both.

05/31/2012 11:53 AM
Posts: 5

no, not multiples. he gets one episode every year , this year, he was already admitted in February for 10 days. He has promised me he wont leave his medicines everrrr and try to control it as much as he can and has promised me that if he gets his episode again he will be ok with me leaving him , but i dont want that. I really like the guy but I get worried about it alot. H ekeeps asking me if i get worried because i'll have to take care of him later in life, and i really dont have any answer. He's really sweet to me.

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