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04/29/2012 02:33 PM

dealing with harsh words from bipolar loved one(page 2)

michellefaith
michellefaith  
Posts: 883
Senior Member

I would say you shouldn't "deal" with it, you don't have to "deal" with it. You choose to "deal" with it by staying with him.

I didn't know my husband had mental health issues when we were dating or married and after 4 kids a dozzon years and 2 dogs later he has a mental break and is dx with bipolor schizophrenic disorder and now I have to "deal" with it. I'm stuck with his suffering.

Now I dont own his CRAP, I walk away and don't feed into it, and it never gets to far. However if he ever got really bad for me or the kids and he stoped treatment and or meds, I'd pack up his Bible books and black clothes and toss him out.

I love this man, the father of my kids, he holds down a job and keeps a roof over our head and food on the table, this is my life my family and most of the time I find joy in it but...

If I knew what I know now....If I knew then, before the wedding the kids, If I knew...I would of run.

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04/29/2012 04:15 PM
michellefaith
michellefaith  
Posts: 883
Senior Member

Invisiblenyc, It makes me sad to admit it but its the truth, and on days like today, when he's on his 3rd beer and is avoiding me, I wish I could run. So I come here to cope, look for joy in the sunshine and take the dogs on a long walk.

04/30/2012 09:04 AM
livinginablender
livinginablender  
Posts: 13305
Group Leader

michelle

oh s*** !

really ?

drinking ?

oh f***


04/30/2012 09:11 AM
michellefaith
michellefaith  
Posts: 883
Senior Member

Yes living....oh f*ck. Sad I posted in the other group about it, would you mind going over and giving my your 2 cents, it's worth a lot to me!

http://www.mdjunction.com/forums/spouses-of-bipolar-in- active-relationships-discussions/general-support/3689958-on- to-drinking-just-more-crap-to-his-crazy#3692074


04/30/2012 03:15 PM
livinginablender
livinginablender  
Posts: 13305
Group Leader

michelle

google alanon

find a meeting nearest you.

that is my two cents

dont allow any more booze in the house

draw a line in the sand.

he crosses it

he can go drink at the f*** park.

dont allow the use of booze in the house

period.

do not allow him in the house when he has been drinking.

it is not safe for you or your kids.

make your home a no booze zone for everyone.


10/04/2012 01:05 AM
confuncted
Posts: 1
New Member

Thank you invisblenyc for these words :

"We cannot fix other people. We cannot save other people from themselves. All that we can do is lead a life that is just and morally defensible and take care of our own well-being. We are of no use to others or ourselves when we allow ourselves to live within the respective emotional gravity wells of people who are unwell and/or dishonest."

Harsh, but true.


10/04/2012 01:04 PM
livinginablender
livinginablender  
Posts: 13305
Group Leader

i do not talk to anyone that screams at me

10/04/2012 01:22 PM
Catbaloo
CatbalooPosts: 6829
Group Leader

Me either, LIB.

10/05/2012 10:13 AM
DMlovestar91
DMlovestar91  
Posts: 8
Member

It happened to me too. When he is in his " high" point and we make each other mad, he calls me names like " slut" and "hoe" when he knows darn well that is not my character...than a few days later he appologizes and tells me that he has a hard time controlling himself when he gets in that mood. It hurts me, but I know the real him really appreciates me.

10/05/2012 10:37 AM
livinginablender
livinginablender  
Posts: 13305
Group Leader

he can control himself

does he call the checker in the grocery a slut when she makes him mad ?

i dunno, maybe he does.......???

i do not feel appreciated when called a slut

those are real words

coming from the real mouth

of a real person

to a real person

its all real.

if it looks like a duck

acts like a duck

its a duck.

the duck is real

every part of the duck, from his head to his toes

the sound of his QUACK

is real.

Post edited by: livinginablender, at: 10/05/2012 10:43 AM

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