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02/15/2012 06:06 PM

what goes up

forfor
forfor  
Posts: 938
Member

Here for the past week I have encouraged others that it is possible to have a reasonably stable and happy marriage. That lasted abt a week. The last episode my hub had was in 05. That time I nearly left with the kids, bit didn't. We went bankrupt too. I told him then I would not be able to go through that again.

Life we on and got better. Fast forward to 2011. I warned him he was getting too worked up. Had some drunk blackouts. He's lucky I'm even freakin here after those. I earned.."nobody else thinks anything is wrong, its just you."

I warned. "What is your problem? You want to see my business fail"

I warned. "F*ck you. I don't know why I put up w you all these years."

WHAM. PING PING PING "wtf just happened? Bad economy. Bad location blah blah freakin same ol blah.

Aww. "Maybe we can work this out". I warned you

Don't worry babe. I'll just work a second job. We'll catch up.

"Maybe I did have an episode, I still don't know. You're always paranoid"

Perfect. I missed the real you.

CRASH. "Wow. I'm tired. Maybe I'm coming down sick. I just needed extra rest today babe"

OH. I'M SUDDENLY RIGHT? OH MAYBE IT WAS AN EPISODE. OH. YOU WANT TO GO TO PDOC NOW BC YOU FEEL LIKE SH*T? OH NOW YOU'RE GOING THRU A TOUGH TIME AND WHY CAN'T I JUST BE SUPPORTIVE? Babe I tried to warn you, even to the point everyone thot I was crazy.

Waa freakin waa. You didn't give me one syllable of comfort when you were raging.

I'm so sick of it. If he freakin whines one more time...I don't know.

Sorry I was hateful guys, but I freakin tried to warn him it was coming on. I had to get that out.

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02/15/2012 08:41 PM
forfor
forfor  
Posts: 938
Member

So how do I let go of his actions towards me in the recent past? I'm angry bc I saw this coming. Nobody believed me. How do I support him now? He's always rode the high side. He was terribly depressed for abt two weeks in 05. Not since then. What do I do now?

I don't have any friends bc I'm always working and spending time w my kids. I have no one to talk to.


02/15/2012 09:02 PM
chelle005
chelle005Posts: 2618
Group Leader

I hate it when you see it coming. Pure terror in your heart.

02/15/2012 09:46 PM
Kitkat777
Kitkat777  
Posts: 1021
Senior Member



Post edited by: Kitkat777, at: 02/23/2012 06:30 PM

02/15/2012 10:17 PM
marriedtoit
marriedtoit  
Posts: 11541
VIP Member

forfor, I tried to find your first post (or some of them) on here to see if you had already answered this, but with the new format, I can't find it!

Is your husband on meds? It sounds like he might not even be diagnosed.

For bipolar men in particular, often it takes a depressive episode for them to seek help. What you want to do is to GET HIM HELP. Now is not the time to say "I told you so." (Although, since I can't find your story, I will admit that it might be exactly the time, if he has been abusive to you for years, etc.) Now is the time to get him into a pdoc as soon as you can. And you MUST go with him, because he will ONLY report the depression. YOU need to tell the pdoc about the mania so he will get the right meds.

Again, I don't know what you mean, forfor, by "how do I let go of his actions." If I could find your intro post or a post about his actions, I could evaluate better your question about that. It depends on his actions.


02/16/2012 03:07 AM
helloall
Posts: 15
New Member

forfor: Isn't it amazing that those of us who live in the house with some cycling can see it coming on? I'm sorry for your pain. I'm sorry for your spouse's pain.

02/16/2012 04:51 AM
forfor
forfor  
Posts: 938
Member

Thx guys. Married- he was dx at 20 yrs old.He's been on meds since. Years of stability. He is a great person. In '10 he had some hypo and that caused him to drink more. He doesn't usually drink. During the blackouts it cld have been bad but I didn't stay at home to find out! First shove and I'm out of there! Lol

I'm mad bc he spent the money. I'm mad bc he didn't listen to my business advice. I'm mad bc it doesn't have to be this way. I'm cleaning up the mess . He didn't need me before, and now he depends on me for everything in this depression. We are in counseling.

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