Bipolar Spouses Online Support Group

this is a rant

i seem to be surrounded by bp ppl.

my husband is bp1

my 5 yr old son is bp.(we adopted him)

i think my oldest son is bp. he sure acts like it

my husbands son is bp.

my 5 yr olds sperm donor, that is what i call the biological

father, is bp.

thank God, all but the sperm donor, are stable at the moment.

sperm donor is now my biggest problem. his mother, my aunt,

lives with us, and is an enabler. she will not, can not, say

no to him. he is a druggie, manipulator, mother beater, and

no good sob. he gets social security, draws it off of his

deceased father. he gets food stamps. he goes from dr to dr,

from er to er, to get pain meds, and we, all us taxpayers, pay

for this. and my aunt allows him to charge them on her bill at

the drug store. she does not realize that she is feeding his addiction. or she doesn' want to.

aunt has recently broken her hip and is currently trying to

rehab. she can hardly get around. now she is having to go

to several different drs, because they think she has lung

cancer.

it is one thing to care for her, but then having sperm donor

calling all the time, coming by, ect. this is just too much.

can anyone give me any advice? when i lose it and say something

to my aunt, she sulls up and acts like i slapped her. she is

very ill at this time, and looking at a diagnosis of cancer. i

don't want to hurt her. she can not care for herself.

God bless

joyce

So sorry Joyce... just know somehow this will all bite him in the a$$ treating his mom that way... its gotta be sad to watch.. I wish I knew what you could do to keep him away. I thought there was a restraining order?? Or is she able enuf to make decisions to not put one in place?

This too shall pass... hopefully soon!!

she doesn't want a restraing order. she wants to see him.

he was adopted too, and she dotes on him. probally why he has turned out the way he has. she never said no, or made him take responsibility for his actions.

Hmmm I think that's how a sociopath is created... always give them what they want... sigh... probably more than an illness,, he needs major therapy I think or he will end up in prison JMO

Hi Joyce, I feel so sorry for you to be watching this and living with it. It's like waiting for the train wreck to happen. This will pass. Unfortunately, I don't think you can get your aunt to stop seeing him if she does not want to. He sounds like a real piece of work.

he has been in prison, twice. the last time i put him there.

he stole check book and wrote $1200 worth of checks. my aunt

wanted to pay it to keep him out of jail. i would not

he needed to be held accountable. i think that may have been

the best 3 yrs of my aunts life.

yes, he is a piece of work. the devils handywork

i have never been exposed to this kind of behavior. i have

3 sons, whom i love dearly. if they treated me like this, i

would still love them, but i definately would not condone it

or enable it. i guess that i just don't understand.

i know that i can't take much more

joyce I know you are caring for your aunt but if she wants to keep doing what she is doing for/to him,, I think she is responsible untimately unless physically/mentally she is unable to help herself. It is sad and awful to see - but really you have enuf YOU are taking care of, if she wants to keep the madness with him, maybe you can "check out" mentally to save your sanity... idk because i'm not in your shoes - but if you could let go of this, maybe it wouldn't stress you out so much. You have enough to worry with!! If he takes her money, and gets enuf drugs he may od or end up god knows where... maybe it just needs to run its course in his life.

that is a big part of the problem. she is unable to care

for herself. i have to help her, i cook for her, help her

dress, take her to her appointments, ect.

the reason i won't let her give him all of her money is, that

she is looking at a whole lot of medical bills, that ins.

doesn't pay, and God forbid, when she passes away, i don't

want to have to borrow money to bury her.

he would take every dime she has. he has done it in the past.

when she came to live with us, she didn't have 2 cents.

since living here, i managed to get her savings up

to almost $25,000. he got out of prison in jan. and her

account has dropped to around $7,000. she has given that

much to him. paying rent, buying meds, he's hungry, he

needs clothes, shoes, a coat, something everyday.

i had to stop it.

so she still has access to her funds?