Bipolar Spouses Online Support Group

Justin~

Please DO take some time before you commit to your wife and to bipolar disorder. Read the posts here to see what you may be in for. It is not like anything you've ever experienced before.

One thing that you both must do, if you choose to go ahead with the relationship and the marriage, is find a highly recommended therapist. There is no way either one of you can deal with this disorder without one.

It is much more than a pain in the a--. We wish that was all it was. Cleaning up after your spouse is a pain the a--, but living with bipolar disorder is pain to your heart.

We don't mean to be negative, just realistic. Living with it is a whole different story than dating it. Educate yourself, find a therapist, and then make the decision you feel is best for both of you.

We all wish you the best of everything.

If i had it all to do over again, I would still do everything the same even though it didn't turn out well. If you love her...read "Loving someone with bipolar" and you and your future wife should identify her triggers, and learn to do everything around not setting off her episodes.

I think if you are armed with the techniques in that book from the get go...that should be a pretty good start. Just go in with a game plan.

good luck!

Welcome Justin, I just wanted wish you all the luck in this journey. I recently found this group and after years of trying to deal with it on my own, life has gotten so much better just knowing I am not alone and having the kind words spoken to me that I have found here. I hope this group can do for you what it had done for me. Talk to anyone you can to arm yourself with as much info about this disorder as you can.

As someone with a form of BP, I can tell you that it takes a tremendous amount of strength to live with someone who is suffering from this illness, especially if they are untreated or undertreated. If you stay here for a while you'll see how much pain so many people are in, the trials and tribulations they go through as their partners go from being on their meds to going off and having their symptoms come back, often worse.

I echo the people who say to hold off and see how the treatment works out. The main thing is to see that your fiancée commits long term to her treatment and that the treatment is truly working.

If she is not willing to accept her diagnosis or fights the treatment, frankly, I would not recommend that you marry. Yes, a lot of people do love their partners enough to stick through them through thick and thin... I had a partner who didn't even though in my case, I wasn't diagnosed and was on the wrong meds. My depressions ate away at our marriage until there was nothing left. By the time I got the right treatment (and I am compliant, have accepted it, and I'm MUCH happier now... I do NOT plan on ever getting off of them), it was too late and we're getting divorced.