MDJunction - People Helping People
 
Ask a Question
04/15/2010 12:25 AM

I'm leaving him. I'm getting an apartment today

lisa777
 
Posts: 64
Member

I can't believe this has finally happened. Any words you can give me would be great. If not, please just have me in your thoughts.
Reply

04/15/2010 01:26 AM
ennray
 
Posts: 277
Member

Lisa,

I have just finished packing up my run aways stuff. I have no advise except for its hard, very hard.

Look after yourself and take the time for YOU! I wish you health, success and happiness.


04/15/2010 01:33 AM
WARHORSE
WARHORSE  
Posts: 5057
VIP Member

Lisa: Maybe it's time for you to be alone/without him for now.... Remind me, since my Warhorse memory is so short.... Is he taking responsibility and on meds?

04/15/2010 07:26 AM
lisa777
 
Posts: 64
Member

He is but I don't think they've started working yet

04/15/2010 07:36 AM
damselndistress
damselndistressPosts: 16948
VIP Member

Well I think some time apart can be a really good thing whichever way this relationship goes. I think for a bipolar person they might think they want to be with you 24/7 but I'm not sure it's a healthy thing for the non. My husband just acts bizarre. Strange things come out of his mouth and his behavior is strange. Like every morning right now he goes on this mouse hunt at like 7 am? He gets very dramatic with throwing things around. I have my boxes piled up by the trash for example (just took a load yesterday and have another load to take) he must of had like a broom hitting those boxes. Well it just drives me nuts when he goes on these rampages. I held my tongue but that's because I know he's going to work at some point and I won't be dealing with that all day long.

You just weren't getting a break from him? And that constant asking if you love me, it's a need for validation insecurity-I think I would have said if you ask me that one more time I'm going to slap you.

Seriously they just don't know when to stop-when they are getting on people's nerves and their threshold is just very very different so our actions and words are like a little flee to them.

My daughter gets so angry at her dad lately that first thing when she wakes up she right away says where is daddy-he makes me so mad I want to give him a wedgie. I just bust out laughing cause it's funny.

But I think the time away and some boundaries might be your key.

Damsel


04/15/2010 11:43 AM
stolenheart
stolenheart  
Posts: 1723
Senior Member

I wish I had left my ex before I was ready to call it quits. Maybe that seems backwards, but I think leaving would have been the ticket to saving my marriage. He was willing to perk up and listen when I left, but I was over it. The proverbial straw was placed on the camel's back, and there's no undoing it.

You seem really hurt by everything that had gone before, and I don't blame you. Do you see that if he was able to get things under control, you would be willing to give it another shot, or are you totally done?

{{{hugs}}} It's never easy...


04/15/2010 12:36 PM
lisa777
 
Posts: 64
Member

Thank you all~ You have provided me so much comfort that were in the painful days before this. I got the apartment and am packing my things. He will also be happy this is over. He doesn't even like me anymore and he is tired too.

04/15/2010 01:53 PM
pjgirl

The only thing i can say is Im glad you are doing what you feel is best. But be prepared for a swing from him...sooner or later. Mine has left twice and at the time was never looking back hated my guts and I disliked his. But the tides changed and he came begging back. You need to be prepared for how you want to handle that if/when it happens. Best of luck to you hun. My thoughts and prayers are with you in this difficult time.

04/15/2010 02:37 PM
Imnoangel
Imnoangel  
Posts: 1981
Senior Member

I am proud of you for taking a stand, Lisa. You're a strong woman with a lot of guts.

I'm feeling like I might be in your shoes soon so let's stay in contact.

I want to know that you are ok and to let you know that you are in my thoughts.

You will find peace and solace with being away from all this drama and finally feeling like life is about YOU and not about HIM and HIS moods.


04/16/2010 12:45 PM
lisa777
 
Posts: 64
Member

He came home while I was moving out and completely broke down. I still moved though. He had a very bad night. I slept after I put my phone on silent so I didn't have to hear him keep trying to get ahold of me. This may be what he needed to realize he can't just be a tyrant and run all over me and maybe it's not. Either way, I'll keep supporting him...from my own place. I love him but I need to love me again or I am going to end up a mess. All of you are so wonderful. Thank you for his messages.
Reply

Share this discussion with your friends:
<< Start < Prev 1 Next > End >>


Disclaimer: The information provided in MDJunction is not a replacement for medical diagnosis, treatment, or professional medical advice.
In case of EMERGENCY call 911 or 1.800.273.TALK (8255) to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Read more.
Contact Us | About Us
Copyright (c) 2006-2014 MDJunction.com All Rights Reserved