Bipolar Spouses Online Support Group

She contacted me today and we talked. And I told her about what I thought she was going through, but boy was that not a good idea.

Apparently me even saying hi to her and letting her know I am here frustrates her. She's worried about how I would act if I saw her out dancing with someone. I deserve someone who misses me when I'm not around, someone who wants to hear my voice on the phone is what she said. I think right now I am just going to give up and move on with my life. I am so mad right now, because I tried my best to understand where she is coming from and it just makes me seem like I'm desperate and I'm sure I just pushed her away even more now. I told her I am trying to cut back on contact with her which is why I don't email her anymore or text her everyday anymore. But nope apparently to her I am so whatever.

I told her I am not going to contact her at all she can contact me if she wants to talk, but at this point I am just going to consider us done for good. I told her I didn't want to talk about this until she was better. Now I feel like an idiot for even saying anything. I wish I wasn't so caring sometimes, it would make this a lot easier. Just funny how it can go to "I love you" one day and the next you don't want to be with me and have all these reasons as to why you don't want to be with me.

Skyman: Don't apologize for your emotions... They are what they are....

I apologize to you that I don't know your whole story. Are you guys together, split, married, not?????

Don't blame yourself for this-we all go through it from time to time. Actually over and over again for those of us who stick with it.

There are no magic words skyman-sometimes just the wrong look and you're done for. Or maybe not saying anything at all would have gotten her too depending on her mood.

Feel free to stick around and vent with us. We have others in similar situations here that can relate to what you're going through.

I'm sorry things didn't work out. We pretty much all know the feeling. I try to stay prepared for the day mine will walk out the door for good. How can you really prepare though? Having friends to help me through it will make the difference no doubt.

Damsel

Post edited by: damselndistress, at: 03/22/2010 07:22 PM

Split, we dated for about 6 months. I'm 22 she is 25, she basically is taking back everything she felt for me. She did miss me when I was not around. And she told me before we even got serious that she didn't like talking on the phone so I never really expected that. Since she is going through a depression episode and doesn't right now she thinks something in the relationship didn't feel right. And I don't think she likes the fact that I have a basic knowledge about the episodes she can go through.

I feel beatin, used, confused. If she had all these doubts while we were together then why did she not just voice them? I want to believe her, but at the same time I don't know if its just her depression talking or not. She is just totally different right now. She almost cried when I sent flowers to her job for vday(no one ever did for her before). Gave me a card saying how good I make her feel and she feels special in my eyes.

Post edited by: skyman290, at: 03/22/2010 07:36 PM

Thanks damsel, I'll just let things take their course. If she comes back then we are gonna have a serious talk about everything. If she doesn't, I'll try my best to be her friend and wish her the best of luck with whatever she does.

Skyman290 you seem like you really have your head on your shoulders. You are very gracious in the way you are handling this situation and you should feel very good about yourself and who you are as a person.

Good Luck

Loyalty

skyman, I know I've told you this before, but this is the exact same thing I went through, and am still going through. What I'm kind of finding out is with my wife there is a kernel of truth to everything she is thinking - doubts, anger, things we as partners did wrong - as everyone does because none of us are perfect. She, in her head, blew those things up 100 times to the worse. I now believe that she also loved me 100 times to the better when things were good. I believe that's why so many of us get so confused, we're so loved, then whammo! So long sucker! Just my observation so far.

skyman and 1dayatatime, are your partners on medication?

1day-

They idealize us and then devalue us. It's a crazy teeter totter.

Damsel

Lisa- She said she was going to start it about two weeks ago I'm not sure if she did yet and I probably shouldn't even ask her.

Thanks for the support guys I really appreciate it.