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fighter
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  IAM AT MY WITS END HE IS STILL MIXING MEDS W/ BEER[ALOT OF BEER],I DINKED GET MANY ANSWERS ON WHY THEY SELF MEDICATE W/ BEER OR WHAT EVER SO I GUESS THERE IS NO ANSWER!!!! IT HAS GONE SO FAR HE IS KILLING ME,REALLY MY BODY TRIMBLES... HE STARTS SHIT AND THEN SAYS ITS ME, SO I SHUT UP AND THEN I DONT LOVE HIM.HE IS CONVINCED HE SOEANT GET DRUNK MY OLDEST DAUGHTER, CHARLEY, IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOO TIRED OF HIS MOUTH, HE TRYS TO SUCK UP TO HER, BUT SHE LETS HIM KNOW HE IS SO FULL OF SHIT , AND HE IS ABLIVEANT TO IT.. IT BLOWS MY MIND!! HE DOESNT WANT TO GET BETTER DOES HE ? AND IN THE MEAN TIME HE IS MAKING ME MORE MENTALLY SICK AND FOR REAL PHYSICALLY SICKER, I WANTED TO BELIEVE HE WOUL CHANGE , NOW ALL IVE DONE IS LET HIM PUT ME IN DEPT BIG TIME I PROBALLY WILL LOSE MY NET., PHONE, FURNITUE, AND I OWE FINES! BECAUSE I PUT MY CAR IN HIS NAME SO HE COULD DRIVE IT TO WORK WHICH LASTED ABOUT 2 PAYDAYS AND GOT FIRED...NOW ALL I HERE IS I TOOK A WEEK 4 MYSELF MORE LIKE ALMOST A MONTH,AND NOW YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN WHEN YOU WENT IN THE HOSPITAL, WORSE! ALL ICAN DO IS SET HERE AND CRY.... HE IS OUT DRINKING AND GOD KNOWS WHAT ELSE, HE WILL COME IN ON ME AND THE KIDS......I HAVE ASKED HIM TO JUST LEAVE IF THIS IS ALL HE WANTS, I WAS BETTER OFF WHEN HE WAS IN JAIL!!!WE WENT TO A FUNERAL TODAY A CLOSE FREIND ODED HE DIDNT WANT TO BE AT THE CHURCH OR GRAVESITE, BUT HE WENT TO WERE THE DUMBASSES WERE GONNA PARTY AFTER!!! I MADE HIM LEAVE ME AT MY GRANNYS I WAS ALREADY SICK FROM HIS RANTINGS AND I TOUGHT THAT WAS DISRESPECTFUL!!!!! 45 MINS AWAY FOM HOME TIME 4 THE KIDS TO BE HOME, BUT I DIDNT CARE ABOUT HIM, I AM A NO GOOD WIFE!!! EXCUSE ME, BUT FUCK HIM HE LEFT HIS KIDS ALONG TIME AGO I LOVE MINE MORE THAN LIFE!!! HE WILL NOT LEAVE AND IS ON PROBATION, I DONT WANT OR NEED ANY TROUBLE FROM THE LAW OR HIS SHADY ASS FAMILY,YOU FEEL ME!!! PLEASE YOU GUYS I REALLY NEED YOU ALL ON THIS ONE, I ONLY GOT ONE REPLY ON THE DRINK POST IWAS JUST WONDERING WHY HE THINKS HE IS BETTER WHEN HE DRINKS I AM MORE THAN DESPART THIS TIME!!!!!!!!!! I AM SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SICK,---H-E-L-P-------ANGIE-----------   |
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norma
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Angie...sounds like you are at your wits ends. I strongly suggest you find out how to remove yourself and your kids from this situation. In the event he comes home and in any way threatens you need to call the police. Is there somewhere you can go to were is is safe until he sobers up? "In the time of your life, live-so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but, shall smile to the infinite variety and mystery of it." William Saroyan
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fighter
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THIS HOUSE IS IN MY NAME, THATS WHAT SUCKS, I HATE LEAVING, BUT YES I CAN GO TO MY EX MOTHER IN LAWS BUT MY OLDEST DAUGHTER HATES IT!!! SHE HATES THE FACT WE GOTTA LEAVE OUR OWN HOME!!!
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norma
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Just for a few days...til he cools off and gets sober...then, I strongly suggest you take action. Make a plan and explain that his behavior is totally unacceptable...and that the next time he drinks, causes a rukus or acts any way other than decent and kind he is going to get out. This is a dangerous situation for you and the children...he looks like he is not going to change...so you have to stop enabeling and start making a stable home. "In the time of your life, live-so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but, shall smile to the infinite variety and mystery of it." William Saroyan
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fighter
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I THOUGHT I WAS, BUT ITS ALL BEEN A LIE!! WHY AFTER I STOOD BESIDE HIM THRUGH JAIL,AND THE HOSPITAL,HE STILL REALLY THINKS I DONT LOVE HIM AND I AM A CRAZY ASS BITCH ............. |
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Marieme
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Hey angie, I lived with an active alcoholic for 8 yrs, so many broken promises. We finally divorced and later he killed a kid when he was drunk driving. If u take the time to read what u just wrote i bet you would see a pattern, that just keeps repeating itself, you know what they say about insanity dont u? you keep doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result...mental and emotional abuse is not healthy for anybody and when one starts to second guess themselves i feel it is time to make space and some firm boundries. I know it is so frustrating and u just want the hell to end. I have a have a strong belief in god and i believe he moves when we decide to do something about our situation...I feel for you and will be here for u....Take care marieme |
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fighter
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ITS SO HARD THE PACK THESE KIDS UP..IWISH HE DIDNT HAVE A KEY DO YOU THINK I SHOULD CHANGE THE LOCKS, I THINK I HAVE AN EXTRA ONE IF ITS GOT ALL THE PIECES?
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Marieme
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Hey i think that u should have a back up plan incase he comes home and is violent. I feel for u and the kids it is so hard on the kids, the drama and emotional pain. I hope u can make some firm boundries and protect your home after all why should u leave and put the kids through this when he doesnt want to act like a human being, nothing special just human to others!!!!!Keep us informed and make a plan |
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norma
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Call the police and report he is driving drunk...and call his probation officer after you get to a safe place...get a restraining order...protect yourself, your kids, and all the people out there driving that are in danger...drunk driving kills innocent people.... "In the time of your life, live-so that in that wondrous time you shall not add to the misery and sorrow of the world, but, shall smile to the infinite variety and mystery of it." William Saroyan
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plugginalong
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as to why he drinks, i don't really have any more answers for you. it is a pathilogical urge. forget it for now, focus on what YOU can DO. i think you need some help from family/friends. hands on help. is there anyone twho could help you get organized? since it's your house, HE should leave. i think you should consider changing the locks definately. I haven't any experience with spousal separation but my feeling is that you should have him separated from you until he pulls his shit together (if ever, who knows. that's up to him.) to get the ball rolling, maybe you should call the police if and when he is drinking and acting out. EVERYONE ELSE, how to flesh out this type of strategy??? More feedback please. Don't give up dear Angie, you are not alone. I know it's hard, it is really damn hard to carry on through this. Keep calm, don't threaten him or bother fighting with him. Keep your kids in your mind whenever you think of what to do about him. Do what is right for them. That is my advice. I worry that he could be a violent man, you should seek to keep calm as much as possible but, start making a safe exit-plan. Don't put your kids and yourself through this anymore. You are on the right track, seeking help. But we can onl do so much. That is why i suggested finding someone to help, hands on. keep in touch, don't lose hope. life will be better again. you just have to DO something to get outta the storm and back to safe waters. |
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