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Bipolar in the family Support Group
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Bipolar Family ForumsGeneral & Supportworn out and discouraged
02/09/2012 07:02 AM
momma51
 
Posts: 2
New Member

I have spent 40 some years dealing with Bipolar. My grandfather, father, both brothers. After 24 years of marriage I divorced my bipolar husband when the abuse just got too awful.

I currently have three adult sons living at home. One has autism, one diagnosed bipolar on meds and doing O K. My third son most certainly has bipolar as I can spot it easily.

His rages which come on from nowhere are getting so bad and frequent.A neighbor called the police several days ago because of it. This young man is doing me in and it is extremely difficult to keep my autistic child and the other son on an even keel.

This son tells me all the time I am psycho, don't think clearly etc.

He is convinced that I am nuts and there is nothing wrong with him.

If I suggested that he might need help I am sure he would go ballistic.

I am so tired and worn out and losing hope of ever having any kind of normal life. I just can't face another crisis. How on earth can I find the strength to take on the biggest battle of my life and get this young man some help?

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02/09/2012 09:10 PM  Top
marriedtoit
marriedtoit
 
Posts: 9110
Group Leader

Welcome to the group, Momma. I can see why you are TIRED!!!!

If you cannot persuade him to get help (you COULD suggest that he is genetically predisposed to BP from his dad), then you might have only one alternative: telling him he either gets a psychiatrist and starts getting stable OR he finds a new place to live.

It must be really traumatic for your autistic son to be in this environment.

All of my advice is based on experience and reading. I am not a medical doctor, and have never even played one on TV.

02/09/2012 09:23 PM  Top
rickcampi
rickcampi
 
Posts: 7
New Member

Momma, please get him out of your house. My best friend had a BP son, she did everything to try and get him away to get help and one day he left the facilty where he was and showed up at his mothers house (my best friend) and stabed her with a KNIFE in the stomach she was the sweetest lady I ever knew and I am sure that MANY PEOPLE will be upset if something happens to you too. PROTECT YOURSELF FIRST !!! I know you love your son but please take my advice..

Previous discussions I participated in:
How did I get Sick
QUANTUM Study
Help me

02/09/2012 10:19 PM  Top
marriedtoit
marriedtoit
 
Posts: 9110
Group Leader

Momma51, there is another group at MDJ you might find useful:

Parents of Bipolar Children.

If you are ever afraid of him in ANY way, call 911.

All of my advice is based on experience and reading. I am not a medical doctor, and have never even played one on TV.

02/10/2012 05:26 AM  Top
jjsmom
 
Posts: 442
Member

Welcome to MDJ!I agree with marriedtoit.You may find Parents of BIpolar children helpful also.I use it alot.I have a 24 yr old son who is BP and had to get him out of my home last March..He became very hostile and disrespectful.I also have a daughter who doesn't have a mental illness, but my son, her brother also put her through hell too.My son demanded so much of my attention my daughter got left out.I still feel guilty about letting BP take over my life.My daughter deserved better and should have gotten equal attention.So don't let your other children disappear in the back ground of your BP son.Staying safe for everyone in the family is priority.Best Wishes*HUGS*

Post edited by: jjsmom, at: 02/10/2012 05:32 AM


02/12/2012 07:53 PM  Top
owutatangledweb
owutatangledwebPosts: 2761
Senior Member

Welcome to MDJ! Your main question was "How on earth can I find the strength to take on the biggest battle of my life and get this young man some help?"

I don't want to speak for everyone else here, but I think generally everyone here would say, and the Parents of Bipolar Children members would say, that you FIRST need to take care of yourself. You cannot help yet another young man unless you take care of yourself first. Make time for yourself to do things that you enjoy. Do what you need to do to re-charge your battery. I need to take an hour for myself before anyone gets up in the morning. I sit on my porch (15 degree whether or not) with my morning coffee and I sit there and pray, meditate and must get myself mentally ready for the day. Fot others, it's exercise, or knitting, or some other hobby. For others of us, it's getting our own therapist.

If you want to help your son, you need to take care of yourself first. It' like the airline stewardesses tell you about the oxygen mask. They instruct you to put yours on first, before putting it on your child.

"Knowledge is the antidote to fear." - Ralph Waldo Emerson -

I stole this from someone else in one of these forums - but it fits! ;)


I am the mother of a 21 year old BP daughter (whom at the moment, I say is "in remission" with the help of Lithium, biweekly therapy for 4.5 years, and an intensive outpatient course of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT).)
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