MDJunction - People Helping People
 
Ask a Question
02/20/2010 01:16 PM

my wife and stepdaughter have been dignosed BP

hdnorm2
Posts: 6
New Member

ok so i am new to this but not the hell i go through sometimes living with 2 BP people and my other step daughter showing signs to at age 9.when my wife and step daughter age 12 who are both BP lock horns it's f%$king on and i just want to get in my car and leave.it almost gets violent as they feed off each other.i have learned (even before my wife was diagnosed) to walk away but seems to infuriate her even more and more so the most stupid arguments.last night she went into a coughing fit, she has had a cough for over a month and i have told her to go to the doctor.the fight was that she hasn't been coughing for a month.i realize that arguing with someone that is BP and torqued up is a lost cause.she has gotten me so mad that i actually left my knuckle prints in a steel door which is so very not me. i am 44 and 235lbs and have realized just how strong i am. i am not violent or physical at all but this is one thing that can sure bring it out.how do you people cope with this? my wife swore it was me that was BP so i went to the same shrink she and her daughter see and i am fine.don't get me wrong i have my issues too! i have ADD and have been depressed and treated in the past,my father is no doubt BP and the psych told me it could come out in me yet but highly unlikley.sometimes i could just pack my shit,my two dogs and go but i love my wife and want my old girl back.she is such a differant person and i just wish i could rember what set all this shit off and why she was never like this before and when the onset was. sorry for jumpimg back and forth but my typing and speed suck.can any relate or give me some pointers? she has no motivation,is for ever sleeping our sex life blows and she is putting on a few pounds(i dont car about that)but it is because she doesn't care.what can i do?she gets made at me for no reason and i am afraid to ask her anything..she has no idea what a strain this is putting on our marriage
Reply
 

02/20/2010 01:26 PM
nikibee
 
Posts: 23
Member

Is she medicated at all or on medicine? Does she accept the BP diagnosis?

02/20/2010 01:37 PM
WARHORSE
WARHORSE  
Posts: 5057
VIP Member

Hdnorm; Same questions.. Is she medicated? Or the daughter??????

Walking away from the argument is the best thing... You cannot win, nor should you try.

Give us some more info....


02/20/2010 01:45 PM
hdnorm2
Posts: 6
New Member

yes they are..sorry, they both take abilify and my wife is coming off paxil but is also taking a mood stabilizer but i dare not ask. sometimes i think the meds don't do jack.my wife has read up on BP and recognizes everything in her daughter but fails to recognize it in herself...(go figure). i am at wits end..also when she found out i wasn't BP it seemed to bother her,she even said "did you tell the doctor about this and that" almost like she wished i were so she could shift some blame

02/20/2010 01:50 PM
WARHORSE
WARHORSE  
Posts: 5057
VIP Member

Hdnorm: It took four years to get my husband's meds 'right'... It can take many meds to treat all the symptoms... One or two meds is probably not enuf... Are you involved in her/their treatment?????

Post edited by: WARHORSE, at: 02/20/2010 01:52 PM


02/20/2010 02:03 PM
hdnorm2
Posts: 6
New Member

involved in what respect? she doesnt go to counseling but see's the doctor once a month and her daughter sees a therapist every to weeks on top of the same psych my wife sees.i am afraid to discuss, or suggest anything.right now she is mad at me and sleeping. we were suppose to go out to dinner but she said that she was running around all day and had no intention of telling my.i told her that she needed to tell or friends.she said i could go but i know that would blow up in my face .we bought a quad this week,it was delivered today and while she was out i took it for a spin and stopped by our friends house.when she came home she said "i didn't even see it" i said what?she said nothing....do you know she is pissed because our friends seen the quad before her? how ridiculous is that? she said i would have raised holy hell if she did that...come-on now! i said i would have never even thought of that! do BP people look for the stupidest things to argue about? or was i actually wrong and selfish by doing that?

02/20/2010 02:20 PM
WARHORSE
WARHORSE  
Posts: 5057
VIP Member

Hdnorm: What I meant, was... are you involved with talking to the pdoc or therapist or both???? If not, they are only getting part of the story. You must have input, as the sane person in the bunch... If they will not allow you to attend sessions, you can, at the very least, fax the pdoc a letter to let them know what is happenning from your point of view.

02/20/2010 02:26 PM
hdnorm2
Posts: 6
New Member

when i went to the pdoc i did explain everything and she is aware.perhaps i need to go with her? or see the the pdoc seperatly. i also have gone to her daughters therapist but only talked about her daughter. her daughters therapist has "recognized" me as the mediator in the household.this is the extent of my involvment

BTW thanks for all the help


02/20/2010 02:29 PM
WARHORSE
WARHORSE  
Posts: 5057
VIP Member

Hdnorm: Either/or will help... Preferably go the pdoc with her but if that is not possible, then go seperately... He/she definitely needs your feedback to do the right thing and prescribe the most effective meds.
Reply

Share this discussion with your friends:


Disclaimer: The information provided in MDJunction is not a replacement for medical diagnosis, treatment, or professional medical advice.
In case of EMERGENCY call 911 or 1.800.273.TALK (8255) to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Read more.
Contact Us | About Us
Copyright (c) 2006-2014 MDJunction.com All Rights Reserved