Bipolar and Pregnancy Online Support Group

Just wondering how everyone is doing? Ive only got 3 weeks left now and i had my home birth pack delivered yesterday so am getting really excited. In many sense i just want baby to b here altho ive still got to complete my last module of my masters degree (which finishes a day before my due date). Yes im pushing it but if i dont do it this summer i hav to wait a whole year to do and just want it out the way with so i can graduate in July

My professional team are getting worried that ill suffer from post partum psychosis so that is worrying me quite a bit, but am trying to stay relaxed n just go with the flow. Anyway thats my update, it would b nice to hear from u, so keep posting

My update:

I had my baby 7 weeks ago. The birth went really well. I did have a terrible depression afterwards. It was so deep and dark I thought I'd never see the light again. I felt like my life was over. All I did was cry and breastfeed, it felt like. I was lucky because my husband and my Dad were really helpful. They took care of the baby when I couldn't and tried to help me feel better. To tell you the truth I don't really remember much about those first few weeks, I was so depressed. But I slowly started coming out of it after a few weeks. It helped to try to do things with friends and not be alone so much. I went back to work at 5 weeks and that seemed to be good, too, to get out of the house. I'm still a little depressed and sleeping way too much. I hate going through these depressions. I was thinking about it and I have had one like this every year around this time for the past few years. I worry about how I am supposed to maintain a life, a career and motherhood when depression rips my life apart at least once a year? I just stop functioning entirely! Anyways, I'm trying to be optimistic and hope that meds will help. I have never been on meds for very long, so we'll see.

I consider myself a success story with pregnancy and bipolar, though! It was tough but I got through it without messing anything up too bad or needing hospitalization. You can all do it too!!

Hey welcome to the group and congrats on having ur baby. Im sorry to hear u had horrible depression, but the main thing is u had the support in place so u knew u werent alone with baby. It would b a gd idea to discuss meds agen with ur pdoc as this may help u, however, ther are other possible althernative or co therapy options such as activities u enjoy doing (at the start it is unlikely ull enjoy anything but this along with ur concentration does increase with time), exercise does help just simple walking n getting out in the fresh air will help (just start of for a 10min walk as u probs wont feel like doing much more) considering u hadnt long given birth (also u can take baby with u), swimming is meant to b really gd (but only do this if u feel up to doing it n once uve stopped bleeding as u arent allowed to use tampons). There are also parenting and baby groups u may want to attend that help u to bond with baby n u get to meet other ppl who r similar positions to urself (i can reassure u many ppl r not happy n coping after the birth like the media n others misinform us). I hope this helps

Hello bob,

Congrats on the baby. I posted my questions on other boards but I will summerize what is going on with me and my wife. Wife is bipolar, did not know till the beginning of the month. She stopped her meds cause we wanted to start a family. She went into mania and was hospitalized for 4 weeks. She is back on lithium now but was recommended that we wait at least 6 months to try again.

Now I am up in the air with having a kid with her. Reading that the risk of our kid having bipolar is as high as 15%. Other risks includes birth defects if she is taking meds even if they are 'baby friendly'. Also she is not young, so the longer we wait, the more risks in the kid having 'issues'. We have an appt with a center in 8 days which deals with women with mental health issues and their reproductive cycles. So they should be able to talk with us and maybe if accepted, go thru with us the procedures.

I am just scared. What should I expect? My family likes to plan, we do not like these kinds of surprises. Well this surprise is too stressful for me. Can I deal with this along with a crying baby?

Most websites say bipolar is mostly environmental and upbringing. my wife had a rough childhood along with her father passing when she was young, probably triggered her condition. Her brother and sister are fine. But both tell me they worry that their kids can have this condition so they are extra cautious and try to detect if any symptoms shows up, they tackle it asap.

How do you guys do it? do you guys worry? it is worth the risks?

Im sowwie to hear u r so conflicted, has she only just been diagnosed or had she been hiding her diagnosis from u for u to only find out beginning of the month? If its the fact she has only just been diagnosed, if i was in ur situation i wud wait atleast a yr b4 trying again, and in the meantime get her a gd therapist if she hasnt already got one who can talk her through what to do in times of crisis, alternative options to helping herself other than meds. Alot in my opinion n from spking to others who r bipolar they often share the view that cbt is beneficial, general talking therapy which can b within ones professional and personal support network, distraction methods and just general learning the triggers of her episodes (they arent always obvious) but stress is a big factor and learning other ways to manage during times of stress. Ive also found self help books invaluable, my favourite is feeling gd, it is about 700pages but well worth the read and has helped me work out things myself, but dont just read self help books seek therapy too. However, i am afraid the key factor is that ur wife wants to get better for herself rather than for u n for a baby.

I personally came off all my meds until i was 6/7months then i started struggling n using zyprexa as prn. However, i barely used it as it knocked me out to much. Before i was about 6months pregnant i still suffered from mania and depression and at time quite severely ie police have been called and i was hospitalised. However, the coping mechanisms i had learnt through therapy helped me to get through and i always had someone i cud confide in when things were going tough, i was constantly on the fone to my mum asking whether i should hav an abortion and i dont believe in abortions but i didnt think i cud c the light and how i would beable to cope with a baby especially being a single mum. I think another thing that helped me was being kind to myself ie when i had pj days and didnt want to c anyone i would just ride it through rather than hav a go at myself for being lazy etc.

Regarding will u beable to cope with her moods and a baby, well only u can answer that question im afraid. However, what has helped me is too put a support plan in place for the worse case scenario ie she has a really depressive/psychotic episode n is unable to look after the baby, will u beable to take time off work n look after her n baby, is there a mother n baby unit in a psych hospital near u (however u will not be with baby so its something u cud look into and atleast consider), also u shud find out how available places r coz wher i live they can b very hard to get into, also is ther any family or friends who will b willing to help u during times of struggle? i hope this helps

hello bob,

My wife was diagnosed when she was 19. She was hospitalized at 23 but since then has been smooth with her meds. Everyone in her family tells me it is a miracle she has been pretty much stable for 10 yrs. some little outburst here and there but nothing lasting more than the day. She totally did not want me to know till it is too late. She admitted it this past weekend. She wanted to have the baby and if she goes too far, she will then tell me, i said WTF?

As of now, i don't think i will be able to handle this. She is already on meds and the last 3 days, she has been acting up. She pushed my button and I fought back which is a no-no. so we had a bad verbal argument. She apologized this morning but i feel this will not be the last. We have moved her pdoc appt to tomorrow morning and see if we can change her med dosages/changes. I want this to work but I don't know if I can make it. She asked me this morning, 'have you thought about us splitting up', and I said no but i know I lied. Just feel bad right now.

im really sowwie to hear she didnt tell u about her diagnosis, i do really think communication is key to anything and even more so when u hav a child, she was probably thinking tho coz she has been stable for so long then its no longer a problem. but like it has it does creep up on u wen u least expect it, but she may not hav realised this. the main thing now is her attitude to getting bk to normal and wetha she is willing to help herself. as 4 u, i think u need to work out wetha u want to continue a relationship with her even if it means possibly neva hav children or sometimes being a single dad, as ther r ppl on the forum who hav not been able to cope with their children and hav given full custody to the father. However, i do have to add that these questions and issues may arise with a different partner wetha they were bipolar or not as i personally believe we should not b defined by our diagnosis and too many ppl with illness wetha physical or mental hav the attitude blame the illness and not accept responsibility for their actions and behaviours.

As for the meds, they can take atleast a month to work effectively and obviously this varies depending on wetha it is the right med as well as the right dosage for her, so in all fairness to her she will not b bk to "normal" so to spk straight away. However, i am glad uve moved her pdoc appointment forward n tht is a positive step. Hav u thought about joining a bipolar spouses group for support from others who r also experiencing the same or atleast similar difficulties?

Yes, I joined but i mostly post in the active spouse thread. I am jumping between threads and reading everyone's stories.