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02/25/2012 03:17 AM

Loss of a child

reen61
 
Posts: 26
Member

Hi,

I am now going thru an unimaginable grief. My 21yr old son Justin passed away this week. I found him on the floor and it turned out to be an overdose. i can not imagine life without him in it. This is the hardest thing i have to get thru. His viewing is next week and i am trying to stay strong and get thru what i have to do now. I am heartbroken and so so sad....

Maureenhttp://cdn.mdjunction.com/components/com_joomlaboard/ emoticons/sad.png

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02/25/2012 06:19 AM
vikingfan
vikingfan  
Posts: 7636
Group Leader

Hello. My names is Sue and I lost my son at age 27 due to an assault which was drug related. I am so sorry your are going through this.

The journey of Grief which you are going on is not one that ever ends. It is a huge rollercoaster. You will start feeling a little better than bam something pops up in your brain and your right back down in that hole.

The first year is the very worst of it with all the anniversarys and holidays. They just plain suck.

Just remember, you are not alone and you are normal. I put on a big show for everyone else when my son died but really I just wanted to crawl right in the casket with him. It's very hard, just take baby steps.

Keep posting, we will be here. It seems to help to get things down on paper. I have an online journal that helps.

Sue


02/25/2012 05:36 PM
smilemore
smilemorePosts: 64
Member

Life is full of suffering. I can imagine what you are going through. I lost my 21 year old son 9 mts ago. It isn't easy. Life isn't easy. You love your chldren with all your heart and do your best to grow them up. So much energy goes into bringing them up.

My grandma was a very strong woman. She lived through 5 children that died during her life from birth, 2yrs to 45. She was always described as a wonderful, caring and upbeat woman but she went through so much in her life.

Seeing your grown child dead is hard, hurtful and so permanent. I just wanted to pick him up and carry him home and say everything will be alright. I couldn't fix him. I miss him and think of him and hurt for him.

Take the advice from sue and do start a journal about your son. sending peace your way.

smilemore


02/25/2012 06:32 PM
heager1
heager1Posts: 298
Member

I lost my daughter 3 yrs ago to a chronic illness she passed away a few weeks before her 22nd birthday. I have to agree with vikingfan the first year is the hardest. My best advice to get support or counseling to try to cope.I have had numerous deaths one right after another and I am now not very healthy.

If I could of done more for my daughter? The blame,the guilt.Its a vicious cycle that I'm sure most parents go through.

Please take care.


02/25/2012 07:50 PM
vikingfan
vikingfan  
Posts: 7636
Group Leader

I believe that no matter how your child dies, you feel like there should have been something that you could have done to prevent their death. We feel like we should have protected them, but truth be known, we could not have stopped it. Those little souls were only borrowed to us to take care of for as long as they were suppose to be here and then they were called back home. Heartbreaking for those of us who get left behind.

Sue


02/26/2012 04:40 PM
heager1
heager1Posts: 298
Member

It is very heartbreaking . my 92 yr old grandma at that time out lived my daughter that was even harder taking her to her funeral and then going to her grave. I told grandma she wasn't suppose to live to see that.
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