Bereavement Support Group

Hello to all of you...I am so glad to find this forum. Like many of you, I have been finding it difficult to share feelings with family and/or friends. My husband and I married very young. He was 20 and I was 17. In June we celebrated our 32 anniversary. In August he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, had whipple surgery 11 days later and died on Jan 16. I am having such a hard time facing the fact that he will never be back..that my best friend is gone and my life is suddenly strange to me. I can't help feeling like I just don't belong here...that I am just going through the motions day to day. I have spoken with a therapist and he did make me realize that part of my emptiness could stem from the fact that I never really had my own life. I went from high school to marriage. Everything I ever did involved my husband to some degree. Now I have to find who I am.....I felt some relief at first, but have come to the conclusion that "finding myself" at 50 is not going to be an easy task. How did you all cope?

Rita,

Wish I had the answer to your question of how I've coped but I haven't yet. My husband of 22 years, Jim, passed away on Feb 21st. I too lost my best friend and soulmate. We did everything together and enjoyed every minute of it. We married when I was 22 just out of college so I never really had to do much on my own either. Perhaps we can help each other through all this.

One thing I've changed is that I've started asking for help. Before Jim and I were very independent making do with the best the two of us could do. Now I've decided there is no shame in asking friends and family for help. I'm also taking things slow and recognizing each new step I've taken and being proud of it.

Wishing you the best.

Nancy

my parents met she was 15 & he was 18 he went in the Air Force she had an engagement ring at 17 & married at 18 she waited for him, they were married for 53 years before he died in 2005. for me I really miss my dad there are good days & bad. I take it one day at a time. he was my best friend because he took me place when I didn't know how to get there. I'm sorry for your loss.

I talked to him before he died I said Love you Meow it had to do with my cat then half an hour later he died.

it's hard to go through each day to know he isn't here. Keep strong take one day at a time. he's all around you every day & his love will guide you. that's how i feel Jaye

I am terribly sorry for you loss. It's never easy to lose the love of your life, the one you thought you'd grow old with and share many, many more memories into old age. It's hard to lose your loved one. To suddenly wake up and that person is no longer there. Please know you are not alone and share anytime. Thinking of you, Rachele

Wow, you guys have been married for a long time! I just lost me wife of ten years and are around the same age as you. While it was the second marriage for both of us, we had made plans for the future and I am having trouble looking ahead and seeing a future without her in it. I have come to depend on her for so many things and everyday, i notice something else she did that I can't do as well. She was the one who took care of the family in ways that I am not equipped to deal with. It does help to hear that I an not the only one with future issues as well as present ones.