Bereavement Support Group

i will admit to it, i am having a very hard time getting past my siblings not helping with my mother, but what is the hardest is knowing that for 4 yrs they never went to see her, she was alert and able to sit in chair and visits were always nice, i just cant seem to get past that. i am also having a hard time over my siblings not at the very least telling me thank you for giving up all the time over the past 4 yrs that i gave up so they could bond with their grandchildren something i have had limited time for due to being my mothers voice in the nursing home. my kids brought my grandkids when i was able to be home long enough to actually spend time with them, which was not very often and never long enough. i do forgive them, but i cant seem to forget the last for yrs of their selfishness and now that mother is gone it suddenly turns into all about them, i just cant seem to get over that part, they had nothing to do with her, but now they are the ones that everyone is surrounding and i, once again am left alone. i did the best i could, my mother was never mistreated, i made sure of that by being there everyday. i know it sounds so petty, but a thank you from my siblings would have changed everything for our relationship, but they missed that boat. ok, all done, thanks for letting me vent,

hugs,

p

Post edited by: Priscila, at: 11/27/2008 11:09

I'm so sorry Priscilla for the pain you feel over your siblings. I understand. I'm having a hard time getting past what my siblings are currently doing. I have not talked to one of them in a week and this is so not like me but I'm just so hurt, like you. You are not alone.

My sister wouldnt do anything for my mom. It has been a point of irratation for both of us. It has been so hard to forgive her esp. since I ended up with 3 pinched nerves from all the driving I had To do to care for mom. My sister was only half an hour away while I was 3-4hrs away. I learned I needed to really forgive her to be able to get through my grief. I had to accept that for her she just doesnt go to nursing homes. She never loved mom so why would she help out. I dont know if this helps but at least you know you are not alone.