Bereavement Support Group

Hello my name is Juls and having a tough night tonight. I lost both of my parents who I was close to and I miss them so.

Daddy died on Feb 18,2005 of Colon Cancer and Momma died August 2009 of complications of Congestive heart failure.

I found my mom sitting up and I knew immediately that she was gone! I can not get the images out of my mind because of how I found her and that someone can be here one minute and die in another room without me knowing about it the next.

It amazes me now how I was able to move to a different apt, get through the funeral and go on. I guess I was in shock.

Some days my chest aches for my mom. I want to be with her but i know I have to wait.

Juls

I'm so sorry for the losses of both your parents. Loosing my mom in 2007 suddenly was devestating to me. I was close to mom. Mom had colon cancer but didn't die of it, was cancer free when she died. It hurt so much. I remember the visions I had of mom on her death bed at the hospital on life support. I thought the images would never leave my mind. They did eventually. I can remember if I sit and think about it but I'd rather not. It's too upsetting. I still miss her every day. I remember too how my chest hurt and felt so panicky for so long when mom died. Alot of what you are experiencing is normal even though if really hurts to feel it all. Do you see someone for therapy or a doctor? It helped me to get through the tough times of the loss. Rachele

Hi, Juls:

I am so sorry to read of your loss! I can empathize with you. 5 years after my son passed away, and I STILL see the images in my head from when I found him. I always pray that they would go away. That when I think of him, I can think of the good times, instead of seeing him and knowing he was gone. *HUGS*

Hello Juls,

Loosing our parents is a pretty scarry thing. I felt like an orphan when My Mom passed and my Dad had died 12 years before her.

I think it's just gonna take some time to be able to push out all the bad feelings about the loss and dwell on the good feelings and memories and it will happen. Like Rach said you are going through the normoal part of the grief. It would be nice if we could go around it, but you have to go through it to get to another side of it.

Sue

Hi Juls, i too have experienced loss and was the one that found my sister. Dad and bother both died also but finding my sister was devastating to me. I was with her a few hours before she passed away and when i returned to her house I was too late, she was gone. I suffer still at times of thought where i see her, and remember touching her cold body, trying cpr even though i knew she was gone. I dont think that something like that will ever go out of mind. It's sort of tattooed there to remain but i do try very hard to push those unwelcoming thoughts out of my mind because i cant bare it. Sue is right over time you will learn to not listen so much to the sadness you feel but start to focus on the good times shared with your Mom and your Dad.

My heart goes out to you. And you are right, you likely were in shock. Our minds have a way of protecting us from too much pain at one time.

Karen xx