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Bereavement Community Bereavement Support Forums General & Support Healing tears. . . When grief is all there is
Healing tears. . . When grief is all there is
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06/10/2008 19:45
Peace4Rach
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 Grief is a human reaction that occurs for all of us at some point in our lives. Our experiences of grief may vary, as will the length of time we grieve. Some of us here have all ready reached acceptance and are at peace. Still some of us continue to grieve and some just starting our grief. All that we feel is normal. There is no right or wrong way about it.

For me, I still grieve my mother's death in Aug. 2007. I do not hide from the grief, even though some days I wish it would go away. I feel the pain and cry the tears. I realized something a few days ago, that I'm not ready to let go and it's ok right now. My mom gave birth to me 38 years ago. I have nothing but wonderful memories of her throughout the years, so granted I am not ready to let go. Until then, I live with the grief through healing tears.
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06/14/2008 19:08
Peace4Rach
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 Had some tears tonight. My daughter turned 5 this week. I was remembering my mom last June for my daughter's birthday. She was so alive and happy. She put so much thought into my daughter gifts always and last year was no exception. There all over my daughter's room. Dolls, musical things, a jewelry box, etc and I found the card she gave my dauthter last year. All this put me to tears. God it hurts so much. It's so hard to enter my daughter's room without crying. Memories of mom are all over her room. Wonder if I'll always feel so sad seeing reminders of mom.
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06/14/2008 19:35
singingangel
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 I hope you can get to the point where you will accept her death. She was there with you at that birthday. Finding somethings will evoke emotions in us. Most of the time I am glad she is no longer suffering and am content. There are times I feel like she is right with us and is enjoying whatever is going on. There are othertimes when I miss her but it is more having my life centered around her. She was the mother I knew for a long time before she actually died. I missed that mom more when she was alive. Sorry for rambling.
I have dystonia, neuropathy, gerd, arthritis, and fibromyalgia, carpal tunnel and other ailments. I enjoy embroidery,music, and reading my Bible and Christian books. I love to bake. I try to be very supportive and positive.
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07/24/2008 13:19
Peace4Rach
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 Almost one year that mom passed. It is still so hard to believe. Some days grief is all there is. I call it my friend becuause it is always there with me. Just my thoughts. Sometimes I just need to put them out somewhere.
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07/24/2008 13:33
singingangel
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 You should try to plan something special to do for that day. She will see and smile. I think some days will always be hard but with time we will do better if we allow ourselves to start enjoying life again. Know my thoughts are always with you. hugs
I have dystonia, neuropathy, gerd, arthritis, and fibromyalgia, carpal tunnel and other ailments. I enjoy embroidery,music, and reading my Bible and Christian books. I love to bake. I try to be very supportive and positive.
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07/26/2008 12:07
Jenna4849
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 Anniversary's are really hard .I try to do special things that they like and it helps to have family to share memoeries with i had my son we laughed alot my parents were so funny like making alot of jokes ..had lunch at his resting place a meal we shared on his last birthday ..may thoughts and prayers are with you Big hugs
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07/27/2008 03:56
Snoopy30
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 I hope your healing tears bring you comfort as well. I promise ther will come a day when the memories will make you smile and bring happiness. since your daughter's room is such a reminder and she is so young a good way to help turn those memories to happy thoughts is to talk to your daughter about the things grandma has given her. ASk her what she remembers about the day she was given this doll or that music box. together you can help each other recall happy memories and it will reinforce her memories so as she gets older she will retain those special moments with both you and grandma.

Hugs

Karen
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07/27/2008 04:04
singingangel
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 Good idea Karen, You always know the right way. I put little things of mom in the rooms I use the most. It brings me comfort. That way if I want to I can just look at it and talk to her. Hope you find your way of making happy memories, Rachele. hugs
I have dystonia, neuropathy, gerd, arthritis, and fibromyalgia, carpal tunnel and other ailments. I enjoy embroidery,music, and reading my Bible and Christian books. I love to bake. I try to be very supportive and positive.
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07/27/2008 04:32
Peace4Rach
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 Thank you ladies so much for your ideas and support. Karen, I have those discussions with my 5 yr old daugthter. She is so smart and I swear she is the mirror of my mother's spirit. She brings her up alot and loves Elvis and his music just like mom. Knows the moves of Elvis and all. So amazing, as is the fact that my mom died on the same day as Elvis, August 16th. And I do plan to do something special for the 1 year anniversary. We all plan to visit her grave, go out for a dinner, strangely, the place plays Elvis music and then we will go to dad's house and reminisce.
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07/27/2008 16:03
Snoopy30
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 that sounds like a great idea. It will be special for all of you.
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