Autism Support Group

Hi, I'm new to this forum. I decided this morning that I really needed to reach out to other people because I find myself slipping into deeper depression. My son was identified with PDD-NOS when he was 18 months old and started ABA therapy a couple of months ago. He has also recently started ST and OT. I acted quickly to get him going with these things because I knew the earlier the intervention the better. And it really is working - he is now verbalizing and communicating more than he ever did before.

Now that the dust is starting to settle, however, the enormity of the situation is hitting me. My husband is also on the spectrum and is not particularly emotionally supportive. I feel terribly alone. I am living in a city where I don't know anyone, and because of my son's busy schedule I cannot work. My husband's parents (who are in deep denial about my husband's Aspergers) do not seem to "get" that their grandson has developmental issues. I catch myself feeling resentment toward them, my husband, and even (shamefully) my son because I'm just so alone.

Hi there! It is natural to feel this way. I think that after a diagnosis is given, you have to allow yourself the time to accept and deal with it in your own way. Everyone handles it differently, but allowing yourself to feel and accept your emotions is crucial. You cant be super woman. This is an over whelming time for you, it is for most of us! With time, you will see that it isnt what you thought it would be, and you will be able to see things in a more positive light.

I also have disbeliving relatives. to this day, it makes things difficult. not having people in your life that just accept and acknoledge your reality makes things soooo extremly hard. I'd like to tell you that they;ll come around, but realistically speaking, they probably wont. Its been 2 years for us, and the people who think its "just a phase" or that our daughter will "outgrow it" , still feel that way. I think that they probably even think that its not autism, but our parenting. ouch.

You are doing the right things. You have him recieving help and you are reaching out to other parents for support. With time, you;ll feel the effects of these things. But it takes time Mommy. I also live very far away from all friends and family. It is isolating for me at times as well. Get your son involved in local events or groups....take him to parks and get yourself involved with other parents. You might be suprised and find you arent as alone as you think.

Be strong, you are definetly NOT alone, and we are all here for support!!

I also want to add that I have aspergers myself. As far as your husband goes, tell him how you are feeling and what you would like him to do to help. He probably wants to be there for you, he just doesnt know how. Men cant read our minds, but having aspergers, this is especially difficult for him. Be open and honest with him and let him know that you need him!

Post edited by: JensVoice, at: 09/06/2011 01:17 PM

Thank you for your kind reply, Jensvoice. It is difficult to handle when you feel alone. I'll try to reach out to other parents, but I'm afraid of being judged. It just seems like most kids are doing things my son can't do. Maybe I'm just not ready to see that. About my husband, I do need to let him in more. I think he tries, but I'm just so angry and depressed right now that I'm having difficulty being open with him.

You;ll get there! I know what you mean about seeing kids do things your child cant. I also have a 2 1/2 year old. I struggle with enjoying her advancements bc in doing so, it feels like I am pointing out Jennas weakness;s. There will be ups and downs, this will pass. Dont be so hard on yourself

Hi there! I have a 21 month old who has just started in home developmental therapy. She speaks in her "own language" except for first letter of word sounds. I am really encouraged to hear your son is becoming more verbal!

I also live very far from family, and all my friends here either have NT children, or none at all. My parents are supportive, but say "i"m sorry" or clear their throats alot on the phone lately which is honestly getting annoying. My friends just don't get it, and could never understand.

I know your feeling alone, but you are not! This is a very supportive group. They have already helped me so much. I have found writing your truths down and reading an understanding response to be a very healing process.

Feel free to message me anytime.