Alcoholism Support Group

Hello there I am new to this site and fairly new to the posting process. I hope I am doing this ok, if not, oh well, I'll learn. I am an alcoholic and have been in AA since 1991. I have been married for 38 years. We have 2 grown kids whose first years of life were mostly about our drinking, drugging and argumenting. I have a great Clubhouse to go to and it is non smoking. I love the sober life and what the 12 steps have taught me tru the years.

Hi, kelti, welcome. I'm glad you've joined us. It seems you are posting ok. I've been in AA myself since 1992. It is a wonderful way to stay sober and learn to live life. Once again, welcome.

Rhonda, thanks for the welcome to the Alcoholics support section. Looking forward to posting here. Kelti

Welcome, Kelti. I have been a friend of Bill's for years, too. Glad you are joining us!

Went to AA meeting tonigt. Lots of newcomers and people on step 4. We were on step 10. It seemed to me they had a clearer head on them than I did wen I first started myself. But then I was in AA for 2 yrs before te fog lifted enough for me to begin working on a fourth step. Before AA I was drinking up to the point of blackouts and doing things I didn't remember doing. I made awful messes in my house and didn't know it until the next am. I was so humiliated and embarrased for my family to see that!

Hey Kelti:

For awhile when I started going to AA I just sat and listened to what everyone had to say. Having never been to meeting before and not knowing exactly how it worked I sort of just took everything in. And if I am being completely honest here for the first couple weeks of meetings I was still in denial about being an alcoholic and not sure if AA was really for me. Finally I came to realize that I was where I belonged. My life was a mess and I had no control over it and I needed to give it over to someone because I was doing a horrible job managing it. I kept going and I got my chips along the way and was so proud of each one I got and wanted to share it with the world only I couldn't because I was embarrassed and didn't want anyone but immediate family to know I was in AA. If someone found out I would blame it on my husband and say he was making me go but really I didn't have a drinking problem. Wow was I living in denial!. I like you would black out and not remember what I did or said and when I would get attitude the next morning from my husband or kids I was shocked what could I have done so bad. I finally got it together got my one year medallion on 6/27/2010, only to start over again on 9/3/2010 because not only am I an alcoholic but I am bipolar 1 and was not treating my disease and took a bottle of pills and downed it with a bottle of wine. I was not trying to get drunk just speed the sleeping pills up.Thank God it didn't work because I am now doing what is right. I want to replace the bad memories of me in my kids head with good ones and I hope to some day do that, I am working hard right now at doing that. Keep going back to AA Kelti you will start to progress with your steps, I still to this day can not get past steps 8 and 9. But 1-7 worked well for me. Best of luck to you! Gina

Yeah, I have been in AA since 1991. When I first started going I was just a nervous wreck and could not talk even if I wanted to. So, I just sat there and mostly listened.Good thing too. I just didn't know anything about myself because I had shoved it all down so deep. It was the steps that gradually started bringing things to the surface that I needed to know about myself. The fog of my whole life started to clear. After about 2 years I felt it was time to do a 4th step. I still have it today. It was awful.. It was just a account of barely scratching the surface of my liabilities. Then a few years went by and I had become more healthy and understood the jist of the steps better. So, I did another 4th step. It was much more clear to my liabilities, etc. I am now looking for a new sponsor , have a couple in mind to ask. Plan to do that in a week or so. I expect to have to do another 4th step too. Or at least a partial one. Being bipolar it seems I am always angry too much and need to apologize to hubby more often. Man, can he trigger me! I try to tell him what my triggers are but he never remembers! Can be a real hassle at times. I don't know how he puts up with me sometimes.