someone Please Help me...!!

The last few months hes been telling me that hes only drinking non-alcoholic beer and I left him alone. Then on saturday I came home early from work and caught him drinking. So I found out that he was waiting till I left for work to start. Well when I found out..he flipped out!! took off and stayed drunk for 3 days at a friends house..he doesn't want to get help. when ever I try to talk to him about it he blames everything on me like theres nothing wrong with. He's staying at a friends house and this morning I started the paper work for a divorce. Im hurting really bad cause i want our marriage to work but I dont want to live in hell anymore!! I also have 2 kids and things are really hard..I dont know where im gonna go or what im gonna do but I feel like if he really doesn't want to get help then I have to go? Is this wrong? someone please help me I feel so lost!!

Post edited by: Darklite, at: 03/11/2008 01:22

drunk or not, violent behavior is never to be tolerated..

Welcome and thank you for your post.

I encourage you to do two things.

First you might want to arm yourself with knowledge. The standard for that knowledge is a book entitled, Alcoholics Anonymous--available in most bookstores.

Second, please give others time to see your post and respond. In other words, keep coming back for a little while.

I'll try to find others in the forums with whom you might talk.

Below are some MDJ links you might want to explore. Don't worry if these links mention bipolar, because much of the behavior and many of the tools apply both to alcoholism/addiction and to bipolar.

It's just that MDJ didn't originally have an alcoholism support group, so some of the issues appear under "dual diagnosis" (alcoholism/addiction with bipolar).

Okay?

http://www.mdjunction.com/forums/bipolar-support-forums/ tips/938-bipolar-or-addictedhelping-a-friend

http://www.mdjunction.com/forums/bipolar-support-forums/ general-&-support/4394-support-or-enabling#4408

http://www.mdjunction.com/forums/dual-diagnosis-discussions/ general-support/40842-dual-diagnosispsychosis

Thanks again.

Kindest regards,

Jim

Post edited by: JR1, at: 03/11/2008 19:17

Jenny

Post edited by: pixiedust430, at: 03/11/2008 13:12

How are you going to help someone who doesn't want help?

I lost everything, several times over, before I sought help. I straightened up each time, got along okay for awhile, but I kept doing what I always had done with my life. After every dry or straight period, I was "off again", and each time it got worse.

Finally I ended up in 2002, on my knees, crying in the middle of the night--stinking and alone. I couldn't get drunk and I was afraid to get sober. I didn't know how to live, but I didn't want to die. I cried, "God help me!"

The next day I got help..., because I asked for it!

That's the way it works with us. We'll sacrifice everything and everyone in our lives for our habit, until we become so desperate and alone that we have nothing left but our pain.

No human can take that pain away, and trying, ironically, only makes it worse. Not even God took my pain away, because pain brought me to my knees and to my senses! So why put it off?

Respectfully,

Jim

Jenny