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05/10/2011 10:56 AM

my story for the second time :)

brokenpieces
brokenpieces  
Posts: 81
Member

hi im new to this group. i was told this one is a lot more active than the teen alcoholism support group. so im going to post my story here too..

it says the exact same thing tho. i hope that is ok?

two years ago, i was in my grade ten year of high school. i had just been diagnosed with depression. i went on a wild streak. i was always out partying and drinking. i recall over christmas break, i was always out doing something. constantly drinking. and i continued it a lot. i was raped on new years, whcih is another story. but it triggered a lot of drinking as an "escape". i got a lot of my alcohol from my dad. he is a big drinker and never noticed it was gone.

anyways, in january of 2009, me and my friends started drinking at school. at first it was just small amounts. and it was no big deal. but then around exam time, i decided to drink more. i was in a really bad place. and i drank a lot. over 500ml of straight vodka. and who knows what else. the result, was alcohol poisoning. it was a huge episode involveing amublances and police being called to the school. i was suspended for a while. and i payed for it later. the consequences were major and i regret it a lot.

today, i still drink a lot. not as much. but i have my times when i go off and drink a lot. i don't know if i would ever consider myself an "alcoholic". but doctor's say i was definently heading down that road.

i dont' want to see people make my mistakes.

i don't want people to hurt themselves like this.

i don't know what else to say. im just saying my story.

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05/10/2011 12:36 PM
Kelti
Kelti  
Posts: 4158
Group Leader
I'm an Advocate

Hey there brokenpieces and welcome to this forum. You can post here and tell us any thing you feel comfortable with. We will try to help you all we can.

Ask yourself this: Does my drinking cause me any problems in these areas of my life?

School/work

Family/friends

Your relationship with God

If you answer yes to any 1 of these you probably are an alcoholic, and your story is that of an alcoholic. Only you can decide for sure. You need help getting and staying sober. Maybe you are just running with the wrong crowd right now and you need to change play grounds and play mates, I know, easier said than done. But we must stay away from people who are drinking when we are trying not to. That seems impossible to me, but must be done. I started drinking as a teen too, around 1967 and I drank til I was 38! Give me a drink and I cannot stop myself! So I stay in AA since 1991. There I can have sober people to hang out with, do things with, and go out with, sober every step of the way. Do you drink every day, do you drink to access? Please let us know what we can do to help you as I, Kelti, am very concerned about your future.Keep posting!!!


05/10/2011 02:37 PM
Griska
 
Posts: 11
Member

I think, friend, that the fact that you don't want people to make the mistakes you have says that you realise you have a problem.

I would recommend you get to a support group and listen to other people's stories. You will realise you are not alone and will be welcomed there.

I cannot begin to describe how sorry I am to hear that you were raped. There is help for this also, I would imagine, in your area.

Please keep reaching out, as you will help yourself, but also in doing so, you will help others.

Take good care of yourself.


05/11/2011 05:36 AM
brokenpieces
brokenpieces  
Posts: 81
Member

i feel like im posting a lot of forums complaing about my lifee :/ and i don't know if it's right. ive posted in so many. and i tell my story. i don't know if people get sick of me "complaining"...

but drinking definently affected me in school. i wouldn't be able to focus. i wouldn't do any work. i would just sit and wait until school was over so i could go and drink wiht my friends. sometimes we wouldn't even make it through the day. im not as bad anymore. but someitmes, i feel like i "need" that drink to stay sane you know?

but i know a lot of the reason i started drinking was because of the fact that i was hanging out with people who probably weren't the best influence on me. i wanted their acceptance. and they were just like me. they had so much stuff going on that they needed a way to "escape". so i saw them do it all the time. and when i got home i would see my father doing the same thing. it was such a common thing around me. that i grew to doing it too.

i know for a fact that one day ill stop. ive figured out my problem after my little cousin, she's in grade nine, got suspended for drinking at school. i was involved with it all because i was aware. and talked to the principal about it the day it happened. when we all had a "conference" to talk about it. she looked at me and said "i did it becasue you did it. i just want to be like you..." and she started crying. that killed me. i don't want people to look at me like that...


05/12/2011 11:32 AM
debhurts
debhurts  
Posts: 1918
Senior Member

Hi and please post all you want to, i feel you are at the crossroads for making your decision to stop drinking. I hope you dont wait as long as i did , it almost killed me. Seriously i got my 30 day sober chip laying in the hospital after they told me i wasnt going to live and decide who gets my kids. I drank daily, it was my choice, i so chose people who drank to have them around me, i didn't want sober friends, that way i didn't have to look at sobriety and i could continue drinking with my people. I was lying to myself and the sorry part is i knew i had to stop drinking , you can get addicted to the atmosphere also, i drank in bars i liked being with other drunks! that way i could say see i am not as bad as that one, truth is i was. I woke up one day so sick and tired of being sick and tired my life was in the toilet, i caalled the operator and told her i wanted to get sober to pls. get me help, a half hour later a lady from AA was at my door and took me to a meeting,i was astonished at what people were saying it was like they looked into my life, and i heard my story in each one who spoke, it was awesome, i reallly wanted to stay sober and they showed me how, it is 22 years and i have not had a drink i thank AA for this, all i had to do is be willing to quit and i was at bottom, i had to drink, it changed somehow from i think i'll have a drink to i have to have a drink, there is this fine line we cross and if a child wants to drink like you i will guess you drink alot more than you think. We will help you when ever you decide to stop, until then please think on this, and keep posting to us we will certainly do everything we can to help you, and we will love you until you learn to love yourself again, so much love to you and big hugs, and please post on we care, Love Debi and you are welcome to send me a pm if you would like to talk personally, ok? Smile 043 379813dfb5548321d7251a264b8c7412 06a36f3e2dec2a1c8344da47ed0b386b
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