MDJunction - People Helping People
 
Ask a Question
05/18/2012 05:27 PM

Coping Tools.

Irishangel88
Irishangel88  
Posts: 4941
VIP Member

Let's start with anger, shall we? (and I only say that because of my "fight" with my fridge last week) When I get angry or upset, I tend to....punch things. Notice I said things, not people. I've punched my wall in my old room twice, a tree, the staircase banister, and most recently the refrigerator. So obviously I need a new coping tool for when I get angry or upset......because i'm sick of spraining my wrist. So, maybe if you all tell me your coping tools when your angry.......I can find a new coping tool?
Reply

05/18/2012 05:33 PM
mem6526

Irish, I found that when I get angry or upset taking a time out really helps me. I try to not react too quickly and say things that I will regret.

Words do so much damage. So I really try to think things thru and have like an inner dialogue before I react to something. Hope that this made sense how I explained it. Blink Wink


05/18/2012 05:52 PM
Anna321
Anna321  
Posts: 10505
VIP Member

I hardly ever get really angry at people. I mean I get angry but the anger is a cover-up. When I get hurt it comes out as anger.. initially. Only a few people are able to get that reaction from me. Through the years I have come to see that my anger gets me nowhere. It usually only takes the focus off the "offender" and makes ME look like a lunatic. I now try to remove myself from the situation and I write. My writing can be dark and explicit and full of fury. It helps me unload. In my writing I am speaking to myself and to the person who has upset me. It is not a thing I do to sort things out, it is to get the anger out and it ain't pretty!!

This disorder makes me very, very angry. So angry I swear and cry and snap like a turtle...lol I actually like it when I get really angry at the illness. In that moment it makes me stronger than IT is. It is like silencing a bully for a short while. I can't force it though...

I think for most people anger is just an expression of some deeper emotion. Anger can be powerful and more satisfying than sadness let's say. Think how many people get into horrible angry fights after losing a loved one! OMG!


05/18/2012 06:02 PM
lovespeonies
lovespeonies  
Posts: 4162
VIP Member

Mindfullness meditation. I have done a lot of reading about the brain and how to cope with anger and emotions.

For me I try to focus in on being present in the moment. If I do feel overwhelmed or angry it is for lots of reasons not just what is happening at the time. I try to separate my emotions which for me is taking a few minutes in quiet to process what I am truly feeling. Usually it is the opposite of what I think...angry but truly sad etc.

Reconnecting with the present, breathing slowly. Stopping the racing thoughts by consciously being aware of how I am feeling at the moment and how I wish to feel. It is a way to step away without disassociating from yourself. To be honest I usually stop to watch the squirrel's in my backyard. Lol.Smile oh and I drink some really cold Diet Coke


05/18/2012 06:13 PM
lovespeonies
lovespeonies  
Posts: 4162
VIP Member

Anna!!!!Smile

Unfortunately I am looked at like a lunatic when I get angry. Stupid bipolar disorder always has everyone trying to determine if my anger is mania based which is truly not fair or accurate. So basically I have had to learn to speedily determine if it is worth it to yell or act out.


05/18/2012 06:17 PM
mem6526

I think that anger is an easier emotion to express than hurt.

I think that hurt and anger always go together. How can you have anger without hurt? How can you have hurt without anger? Wassat

I think that whichever emotion is shown first the other always follows and vice versa.


05/18/2012 06:22 PM
Anna321
Anna321  
Posts: 10505
VIP Member

Danielle!!! Smile I am look upon as a lunatic also I am afraid.. A psycho actually!!! lol Oh dear God... it is sad.. Oh, during an argument people will very often try to blame your behavior on your conditions. That is your "weak" point after all, and something you have no control over! ... Detaching myself and doing some gardening or a chore also helps me. The worst is if I stay still and stew. Then it gets to be overwhelming, sadness comes and it gets so dark in my head.

05/18/2012 06:23 PM
Anna321
Anna321  
Posts: 10505
VIP Member

Very true Angel! I like that!! Good thing to remember too.

05/18/2012 06:27 PM
mem6526

When people start to annoy me I say this to myself.."Consider the source"

I know that probably sounds mean but if someone says something to me that they have no clue about and they don't know what they are talking about then I just try to let it go. I usually will tell the person to educate themselves because they sound ignorant. Then I work on my breathing..lol Blink Laughing Laughing


05/18/2012 06:35 PM
Anna321
Anna321  
Posts: 10505
VIP Member

No, it is not mean. I do the same. Not many people can get to me. I have enough self love to protect myself in that sense. I know my truth, and I know it need not be other people's truth. Every opinion is just a perception. I always remember that. Just because someone says something does not make it true! However, it does not work as well when you are dealing with people close to you. Them you just want to choke a little!! lol KIDDING!
Reply

Share this discussion with your friends:
<< Start < Prev 1 Next > End >>


Disclaimer: The information provided in MDJunction is not a replacement for medical diagnosis, treatment, or professional medical advice.
In case of EMERGENCY call 911 or 1.800.273.TALK (8255) to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Read more.
Contact Us | About Us
Copyright (c) 2006-2014 MDJunction.com All Rights Reserved