Agoraphobia Support Group

As the newest Group Leader in the Agoraphobia Group, it concerns me that so many people never participate in the forums. They read the post but hardly ever reply. Some people join and then we never hear from them again! Think about it. We have over a thousand members and only a few participate on a regular basis. Being a strong believer that every member has something which can benefit the group as a whole, I am on a mission to find answers. So to all the lurkers, lookie loos, and long lost members out there, I have some questions and I’d love to receive some answers. If you don’t feel comfortable replying in the forum, feel free to send me a private message or an email at perrymusa@yahoo.com

Do you not post or participate because…

you are shy or have social phobias?

you feel like you have nothing worth contributing to the group?

we as a group are doing something wrong?

you have been offended by someone in the group?

you have been cured? (If so, we would really love to hear your story!)

you are not getting enough useful info from the group?

you do not feel welcomed at MDJunction?

you spend time on MDJunction at another group other than the Agoraphobia Group?

the Agoraphobia Group did not live up to your expectations?

everything posted on MDJunction is open to public viewing?

Since you could view all the post in the forums without having to join… what led you to join the group?

What, if anything, caused you to leave?

Is there anything we can change or do that would cause you to participate or post more often?

Is there some other reason for your absence that I have not thought of?

I want to help make the Agoraphobia Group the best group on MDJunction. I appreciate you taking the time to read this and look forward to hearing back from as many members as possible.

Sincerely,

PerryM

I sent you a message but I will let the others know too.

I am absent a lot because of personal reasons. It takes almost all of my energy to keep things together. My stress levels are so high! That and I am a GL in other groups and it is taking me a long time to get caught up. I get exhausted really easily.

I have been having a lot of anxiety so needless to say, I am not cured yet. *sigh*

I promise to visit more often. Thanks for the kick in the pants.

I do visit daily and try to post at least once or twice per day, yes I am shy.

Henry,

It's ok to be shy. We don't want to push anyone or make you feel like you have to get outside of your comfort zone. We do see you participating and are glad that you are here. You just keep doing what you are doing, and if you feel like posting more, you will. We are glad that you are here. Thanks for being a part of our agor family! HUGS

Do you not post or participate because…sometimes I have nothing to add or to say.

you are shy or have social phobias? No, but I do have PTSD which complicates matters

you feel like you have nothing worth contributing to the group? I have felt like that in the past. Someone might say what I was going to say so I got into the habit of just posting "I agree with (blank)!"

we as a group are doing something wrong? As Agors we are extremely aware of our own faults and may lack self-esteem. I prefer to look at it as the ones not posting have gotten what they need from us in way of answers and are out there practicing what WE preach.

you have been offended by someone in the group? Believe it or not, I do get offended. BUT I realize that I may be reading more into the post or reply than was intended...so I will ask questions to allow the person to explain.

you have been cured? (If so, we would really love to hear your story!) There are some that are living a life free of Agoraphobic symptoms. They know that it is futile to stick around and try to pull us all out of it because it is a personal battle. This is a battle that we have to face individually WITH the support of others

you are not getting enough useful info from the group? I would have to completely disagree with this one. I have been around long enough to know that a person will ask a question and those that have been affected by that issue will ultimately speak up.

you do not feel welcomed at MDJunction? I think that the action of joining a group like this is a huge step. There are people that will join MDJ and not join a group because they don't want to 'disrupt' what is seem as a very tightly knit group. I was that person at one time too. Once a person takes that step to join the Agors, they get a personal hug from ME and a friend request from YOU! Maybe that scares them away?

you spend time on MDJunction at another group other than the Agoraphobia Group? There are many members that are still a part of the group but have gone on to become group leaders themselves. These were the members that would constantly post threads. I also have another group that I spend time on recently. It isn't because the Homies here are not helpful or supportive, it is because I am moving forward in my recovery.

the Agoraphobia Group did not live up to your expectations? Disappointment equals Expectations divided by Reality. We are all suffering and there are days that we just can't give anything more of ourselves because there may not be enough to share AND get through the day facing our fears.

everything posted on MDJunction is open to public viewing? Everything posted on the WWW can be used against you in the court of law...seriously. Be careful what you post. Be careful who you give your private info to. This is a Homie Public announcement brought to you by Mama Bear

Since you could view all the post in the forums without having to join… what led you to join the group? The need to belong and not feel like I was crazy

What, if anything, caused you to leave? There are times that I need to take a time-out because of circumstances beyond my control

Is there anything we can change or do that would cause you to participate or post more often? I am in charge of my own recovery. There is nothing that you can do besides lending a helping hand. You have done that already. No one needs to be spoonfed...that defeats the purpose of taking the steps to trust.

Is there some other reason for your absence that I have not thought of? Actually, yes!

*Grief and loss

*Financial reasons

*Relapse

*Vacation

*Relocation

*Illness (personal and family)

*FEAR

*Low Self-esteem

*Too busy at work

I try to participate as much as I can. None of the above reasons apply to me but there is one that does. FALL TV. lol. So many shows are returning and so many new ones it's hard to keep up. Just kidding.

There is one other reason I have noticed just in myself. I've joined other sites and never participated, maybe only once because I was just lazy I guess and sometimes it's hard breaking in but here I find it easy and natural.

I love this group.

Thank You Mabri *hugs*

Thanks for the replies. Just about everyone that has responded here or to the hug I sent are members that already post. What I am hoping to hear from are members that never, ever post. It is not my intention to imply that everyone should post more often. Its understandable that some members are able and willing to post more often than some others. My concern is that we have so many members that we never hear from. I just want to make sure we are doing everything we can to help them.

Bump

I am shy and have social phobia problems even online. Sometimes I'm not sure what to post about here. Here are some of the things I've thought about when it comes to posting...does it matter if 100 people have posted the same subject before or do I have to search and add to their thread? Will anyone respond? (It's easy to get discouraged being an agoraphobicsocialphobe.)

Maybe there's just a lull happening. I've noticed it in other groups, lately. Seems like groups as a whole get quite for awhile and before you know it, everyone is sharing and participating again.

Also, personally, I have made some progress and haven't been at home as often and when I am, I'm tired and I do lookie loo, but can't seem to think of what to say. I find that reading others' posts in itself can also be very helpful.

As far as being offended by someone here...well, if anyone in this everloving group has the utter gall to offend me, well, well...I'd just glare! Glare I say!! Glare at their puny little square profile pic and just not smile at it!!! That's what I'd do!!!! I might even have the nerve to, to...frown!!!!! Yes I did, I said FROWN!!!!!! That would teach them!!!!!!! (If anyone was offended by my excessive use of exclamation points and rant, well ' on you! )

But seriously, I do hope things pick up.

I appreciate this group and found lots of support here and it's been very helpful.

Thank you for your service Perry and to everyone for being here.

Now people, please post dagnabbit it, or I'll frown at your profile pics, too!