Agoraphobia Support Group

Hey everyone, my name is Tim. I'm 30 years old and I live in Shreveport, Louisiana. I've been struggling with Agoraphobia for several years now. I've been in therapy for a while and have tried many meds but I still can't seem to get a handle on it. I'm pretty much to the point where the only time I leave the house is for an appointment. Up till recently I've managed to get by like this without seriously effecting my family, but this past month has been extremely difficult. My uncle went into the hospital and they found advanced kidney cancer. He remained there for several weeks and i kept getting messages and calls to go see him since the outlook was bad. I can't explain why, but the mere thought of dealing with this, of answering the calls or responding in any way cause me intense anxiety. I just kept thinking everything would work out. Several weeks went by until finally he was released into hospice care, with a estimate of 3 - 6 months. He passed away 2 day later. My only thought at this point is regret. This illness, this ridiculous affliction is not only ruining my life, it's isolating me from my family, and it seems impossible for them to understand. Is this gonna last forever? Are there any effective treatments, as most medications lose there therapeutic effects once tolerance sets in? Even now my therapist has given up on my because I've missed so many appointments she believes I'm not serious about my treatment. I don't understand how a therapist can drop a client when the illness makes it much more difficult to commit to every session. And at this point I'm not confident that any hope remains. Ultimately, this group is simply a last resort. Thanks.

Hi Tim and welcome to the group! I live in Louisiana too but way down by New Orleans. Wish we were closer. I've had agor for many years too. Sometimes its worse than others so don't give up. There is always hope! Sounds like you might need a new doctor. I know that good ones are hard to find so you have to keep looking. Have you ever tried meds? Seems like there are always new ones coming out. You just have to find the one that works for you. There are also many self help programs out there too. Some can be kinda costly though. In my case its my depression that holds me back I think. But thats a long story. Hope you stick around. This is a great group of folks and we support each other. If it makes you feel any better, I have a daughter and grandson that live near the air base up near you. I haven't been able to travel up there to see them or their new house, so I understand about regrets. Hang in there! We will survive!

Hi Tim, welcome to the group. You've come to the right place for understanding and great people to help you.

Sorry to hear about your therapist. You would think her treating people with this condition would make her have complete understanding. Keep searching for the right therapist. There are great ones out there. It took me a long time to find one that I connected with.

As far as regret with this illness, I think we all can relate. There is so much regret for what we want, need, or know we should be able to do. But we can't beat ourselves up over it. If we could do it we would right? No one chooses to be this way. I am full of things I regret not being able to do, but I know that those who love me and understand know that my heart is with them even if I can't be physically. It is so difficult for other people to comprehend what this feels like. Unless you experience it yourself you just don't completely "get it".

Never give up.... you will beat this some day

Hi Tim,

Welcome to the group. Today is your lucky day! Yup, I said lucky! There comes a point in every Agor's life when they get to the point of frustration and they come here. We get it. In time, and it does take time, you will learn to step out and face your fears. One baby step at a time. That's what it takes. Some steps are harder than others, but I am sure you will be able to make progress.

Cheryl

A little over a year ago my Grandpa who I was very close with had diabetes and ended up in the hospital. I just could not go to see him at this point because of my agoraphobia and panic attacks. The drive was 30 mins away and at this time I was so bad I barely left the house. Thankfully he was moved to a nursing home across town. I did manage to go but oh my gosh was it so hard. My heart was racing so fast but once I got there something came over me and I was able to stay and say goodbye to him. He died a few days later. I so wish I could have been there more. He was asking for my son and that will to this day just break my heart. I was able to go to his funeral but not his burial. The burial was 10 mins away. I just couldn't do it, the fear just took over. SO I can in a way relate to the regret and for me I felt so much guilt.

But I will tell you there is hope for you. Amazingly I have come a long way since that time. I never thought I would ever step foot in a store let alone go to where my grandpa is buried 10 mins away. My grandma lives in the town so I am able to go see her oh my gosh what a feeling of relief it is to know that I can go there.

Feel free to read my diary anytime and it better explains what I used to not be able to do and what I can do now.

There are so many wonderful people here and these people have helped me so much. Without this group I don't think I would be this far.

Regret and guilt. I'm pretty sure most -if not 100%- of us know exactly how you feel. Here you'll get more understanding than you've had in the whole time you've been dealing with the Agor. At least that's what I've found.

Welcome to the group Tim. This place is the place for Agors, we all understand that it takes time to move forward. Do find another doctor there are plenty of them out there. You should find one you are comfortable with. Good Luck

welcome Tim , we are all able to relate to agor here, and all the isues that go along with it, i hope this group will bring you the kind of comfort that it has brought for me ! Welcome, Neil.

Post edited by: devlin, at: 07/02/2011 07:52 AM

Hi Tim...I'm really soo glad you found us. This group has been such a huge help for all of us and we are here for you. We are like a family and support each other through thick and thin. Keep posting and letting us know how you're holding up ok? The friendships you will make here may turn your life around!! It has for soo many of us!! HUGS!!!

Hey Tim welcome to the group here, this is an awesome extended family here because we can each relate to the trials and tribulations of the condition were all facing. Everyone here is 100% certified awesome too...very helpful and great support!