|May 12 2010|
I had a bad dream last night. In the dream I had a little spot of blood in my underwear and started panicking, even in the dream world I over re-act. My pregnancy has been going absolutely fine, so I don't know what prompted the nightmare besides anxiety. It's weird though because when I woke up in my email was some note about bleeding in pregnancy and what to do about it. It reassured me though because it said if you've seen a healthy heart beat in 7-11 weeks the pregnancy has a 90% chance of going along just fine. My doctor also told me teens very rarely miscarry so that made me feel alot better. I was so tired today I couldn't bring myself to go to school, which made me feel guilty. There's only 2o-something days left, last day is June 13th? Graduation about a week after that. I don't want to go to prom. It seems so stupid, and they want a meeting for all students and their parents to go to- that completely eliminates the point of growing up and stepping out on your own. I don't know what I feel guilty about, I just took my AP, one of my classes was canceled, the other one is a joke and the other one's an art class. I have no idea. And I have work later, if I miss work I beat myself up over it because I feel so bad. So tomorrow I'm supposed to tell my little sister. Who understands, nothing and is probably going to treat me like crap and bring up a ton of lies from my past that people made up to trick me into doing something I didn't want to.
So, I dread that.
My next sonogram isn't until June. I'm hoping it'll look more baby like then.
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