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1magicman"Before i found MDJ i was in the deepest darkest part of my life after my abduction. I wanted to feel safe. I wanted that sense of being a normal person.Finding MDJ and the people with in it has steered me down the correct path into the light of hope. The feeling of hope that i was not alone,the feeling of hope of understanding,and the feeling of hope to move on. I never give up hope." (1magicman)

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Walkinginahaze Everything and everything to do with coping with Bipolar.


Feb 04 2011

Today I have been calm and quiet. I often wonder and wait, when will the next mood swing arrive? How will it arrive? Will someone inadvertently say something and it sets me off? 

 TodayI called the Mood Disorders Association of British Columbia to find out if there are any support groups in my local area. Turns out there are, they are the 2nd Wednesday and 4th Wednesday of the month. If I want to go to more, the head office in Vancouver has them every Tuesday and Thursday afternoon.

I called back just a few minutes ago and was kind of hoping there would be a group this evening, even if just for an hour. I was finding the courage to go and well not surprisingly, there isn't. The lady on the phone said they don't usually hold any groups on Fridays.

 I know that I need to go to outpatient support group, but I can't start any groups til I see an intake worker on Feb 21, so for now I stay in limbo. Yay, NOT!

I feel so fat too! The Serequil that I take at night, even though it is a low dosage, the side effects I have been having, primarily the dopey feeling and the craving of carbs are not ones I want to have! I talked to my family doctor yesterday morning about what to do with my situation, and unfortunately he said that I was on the best combination of medication right now. That being Effexor XR and Serequil. I also take a beta blocker for anxiety, which does help.

I feel blah, the weather doesn't help either and I had hoped if there was some kind of support group over the weekend, perhaps I could gather my courage and go, perhaps meet someone who feels what I feel. That could help lift my spirits to help me realize that I'm not the only one going through these feelings. Alas, I have to wait til Tuesday of next week before any support can be looked into. 


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