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mechjockusa was anger and pain, now it is a little emotion called love.


Group Leader

Jan 14 2010

I have spent the day answering post and trying to put at least some thoughs in every post on the site.  Poor Erin likes to moniter how I am doing and she has most likely been going crazy tryingto keep up.  I hope I did not over do it but I do consider the position as a responsibility to help as many people as I can.

This has given me a new prspective on life.  First I meet the Woman of my dreams, then April feels I could do a good job working with her.  Everything seems to be getting better.  My boss at work got a lesson in how to not talk to people, she found out yesterday that I tried to kill myself because of comments she had made.  She did not understand what she had done, she triggered me into a panic atack when we talked yesterday.  I explained how her comment had struck like a dagger.  she explained that she had meabnt because I did not get the grafitti removed and a toy that was broken on the play ground, did not get it fixed or removed...etc.  Told her it was a personal attack and it almost cost me my life,  You could hear it click in her head, she knew what she did but made no apology for it.  Fuck it at least she knew when I got through with her.

Back to more pleasent stuff.  Working on work and jumping on the computer was a lot of fun.  Looking forward to trying to help others.  Well hope I do not piss anyone off by being so active but i truly just want to help.  ok enough for now Erin I love you dear.



Previous diary posts by mechjockusa:
Comments (1)Add Comment
written by beentheredonethat, January 14, 2010
Tom, I know you don't know me, but I must say to you that other people are not responsible for how you act. They are not responsible for your suicidal feelings. You are over-reacting when you turn to suicide. Likely a result of unresolved hurt feeling that have nothing to do with your boss.

sorry, I call it like I see it. You are a man and have to take responsibility for your own emotions and reactions you have toward others.

with all due respect. I think you are a great guy.

my best to you,

jim

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