saddness

well, my son's fiance called my cell phone.  no message, but it picked up as a message...and she said nothing and hung up I guess.   I was almost going to call or text, but giventhe relationship I have with my son, what if they are back together, and testing to see if I picked up when SHE called, since I do not anser if he calls, and I do not contact him at all right now....then he would hate me even more.

I so miss her. Of course, I love my son, but she was so special.  I felt a real love towards her and would love her to be with my son, provided THEY BOTH can get straight and off drugs and never ever return to drugs.  It is sad for me.  Just sad.

God never gives us more than he knows we are capable to take and to handle.  God gives me strength when I get sad, and weak, and want to give up. 

I just talked to one of my old friends. first time in a few months.  she has lots of stuff too, and we both pray.  It was a good talk. 

Please, pray for my son and his EX fiance.  I love them both very much. If you read this in my diary, please say a small prayer that they find God, and that they are provided the tools they need to get their lives back on track.  Thank you so much.