i am to the po

int in my life where i can talk about it without hesitation. But i am having a very hard time lately with flashbacks!

None of my friends have been raped. So although theyhave opened their arms for me to talk about it with them. They wouldnt truly undrstand unless it happened to them and i hope it never dose.

iv always been the strong one. never showing that somethings wrong. but i am screaming on the inside still after 11 years! 

last night was the worst. i was with my boyfriend (who is a good man) and we where w....well you know! and in the middle of it all i freaked and just started balling my eyes out. Usually i can just push it out of my head but the memories hit me like a hammer!

So i thought id join a group......maybe ill find someone to talk to whos going through the same thing as me!