Why wear a ribbon?

"eating disorder" (Sweettrueluv)

MDJunction to me

"Md Junction to me is my safe place. A place where I can feel safe to just open up talk about everything without burdening my wife. With all my health issues its nice to know that I am not alone, suffering form fibromyalgia,depression, and costochondritis with anxiety is a nightmare. Having the great people here at MDjunction is so great its hard to put into words. I dont think I would be getting through what I am going through without this great resource. I think everyone should know about mdjunction!" (Fmsdaddy)

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roxys sadness

all my fears, tears and sadness...

Going in circles

Jun 30 2012

I'm so tired of going in circles about his bp. That is all I hear about I am already paying all the bills, forced to go back to my parents house cause of his episodes had to borrow money to break my lease and now I am forced to share MY car with him cause he crashed his car. I am also forced to shared every gruesome detail about his suicide since he did it from my freaking car and I had to run after him and save him I am tired... I keep thinking how do I leave someone who is sick of he had cancer or any other illness I would stay but the fact is he doesn't and I am exhausted any little thing I bring up he finds ways to have it go and somehow compare it to his BP.. He got fired and now I too share this burden I am only 25 will I always feel this way?? I want to end our relationship but I don't know how I feel so tiny and weak any little thing is just settin me off with him and I feel I may snap one day... Oh help me God... I am so tired of him explaining one thing then 2 minutes later coming back again and explain a different way then say oh it's the bp I know I know...

Previous diary posts by Roxanne87:

Running on empty
Unsure future
Understood
Oh it's just life..
Oh life

Uncertainty now...
true love
Uncertainty
sadness

Comments (1) Add Comment

written by Silverlock, July 02, 2012

When I had a chance to talk to my wife's sister, she said that the happiest day in my wife's life was when she was diagnosed with BP. She said it was because my wife now had someting to blame everything she did. If they are not doing everything in their power to work on the condition, then they are just using it as an excuse.
It seems my wife knew she was BP for a few years, though we were together for a year before she told me. she also played with her medication, her sleep, did not tell her doctor the truth, and kept drinking. I figure when she comes down off her mania, she is going to tell everybody about the horrible things she has done "oh, it was my BP". But at that point in time, with all that knowledge, it is no longer the BP, it is here not dong what she has to do.
I think the same can be said for the situation you find yourself in