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May 14
2008
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SORRY I HAVNT BEEN ON BUT THINGS ARE CONFUSING RIGHT NOW AND I AM SO TIRED OF A LOT OF THINGS.I AM TRYING TO CRAM 8 LOST YEARS AND MAKE UP FOR IT ALL IN THE PAST CLEAN AND SOBER YEAR. I AM OVER WORKED,WORRIED,ANGRY,CONFUSED,LOST AND TIRED!! I NEED MY READINGS,MEDITATIONS,MEETINGS AND A SOCIAL LIFE AND DONT TAKE THE TIME FOR ANY OF IT...HOW DO I STOP SOOOO MUCH OF EVERYTHING ELSE AND TAKE TIME TO SLOW DOWN FOR ME???BUT IF I LET UP ON OTHER THINGS I FEEL I AM NOT DOING MY JOB OR PROVIDING ENOUGH AND TAKING TIME AWAY FROM MY FAMILY.I AM ALSO SO STINKIN WORRIED ABOUT THE HEPATITIS C ,I GO BACK TO DOCS THE 3RD OF JUNE FOR LIVER BIOPSY AND THE TREATMENT OPTIONS.I FEEL REAL SICK SOME DAYS AND HAVE VERY FEW GOOD DAYS AND I CANT SLOW DOWN I NEED MY JOB AND THE HOURS,AND BE ON THE GO FOR MY FAMILY.THE TREATMENTS ALSO I HEAR SLOW YOU DOWN AND MUCH MORE !!!
Comments (3)
written by bejeweled, May 15, 2008
That anything I put before my sobriety I will lose.
written by CarolynT, May 16, 2008
Hello There,
It is so easy to drift away from our family and God when we get focused on ourselves. And then we try so hard we spin our wheels, believe me I can relate.
It sounds like you have faith in Jesus Christ as your Savior. So I will share some things that have helped me to get through my dark seasons of life and increase my faith in the power of the Holy Spirit and build my relationship with Jesus through His awesome Holy Spirit.
I pray that it will help or at least inspire you while you get through this difficult trial and season of life.
One thing I have started doing over the past year is reading the Bible each day. I try to read a chapter from the Old Testament and the New each day. Now for awhile I felt like what use is this. I don't even understand what I am reading and who are all these people and all these names. The first five books of the old testament are the hardest. But I just kept on in faith that God and His Holy Spirit would reveal to me what I needed to know in His time.
So here I am today, Almost 2 weeks ago I took a step in faith after a year of reading the Bible daily and Biblical counseling and a talk with my pastor. I had a conversation with my dad and told Him I forgave Him. If you read my journal on Forgiveness both part 1 and 2 it will give you more insight to what I am talking about now, so I won't go into detail and read it only if you have time and have a desire. I will pray that the Holy Spirit fills you with a desire.
I am truly in awe of how God works. SInce I spoke with my dad, I have felt a tremendous burden lift off my shoulders and I am not a raging ball of anger and I am not as angry with my mom any more either. Praise God. NOw don't get me wrong, I still have my struggles each and every day and have to go to my Heavenly Father for His amazing mercy and grace. But I really have faith
and I am sure that He who began a good work in me and you will bring it to completion until the until the day He returns.
Philipians 1:6.
Love in Christ, Carolyn
Thanks for your diary entry.
It is so easy to drift away from our family and God when we get focused on ourselves. And then we try so hard we spin our wheels, believe me I can relate.
It sounds like you have faith in Jesus Christ as your Savior. So I will share some things that have helped me to get through my dark seasons of life and increase my faith in the power of the Holy Spirit and build my relationship with Jesus through His awesome Holy Spirit.
I pray that it will help or at least inspire you while you get through this difficult trial and season of life.
One thing I have started doing over the past year is reading the Bible each day. I try to read a chapter from the Old Testament and the New each day. Now for awhile I felt like what use is this. I don't even understand what I am reading and who are all these people and all these names. The first five books of the old testament are the hardest. But I just kept on in faith that God and His Holy Spirit would reveal to me what I needed to know in His time.
So here I am today, Almost 2 weeks ago I took a step in faith after a year of reading the Bible daily and Biblical counseling and a talk with my pastor. I had a conversation with my dad and told Him I forgave Him. If you read my journal on Forgiveness both part 1 and 2 it will give you more insight to what I am talking about now, so I won't go into detail and read it only if you have time and have a desire. I will pray that the Holy Spirit fills you with a desire.
I am truly in awe of how God works. SInce I spoke with my dad, I have felt a tremendous burden lift off my shoulders and I am not a raging ball of anger and I am not as angry with my mom any more either. Praise God. NOw don't get me wrong, I still have my struggles each and every day and have to go to my Heavenly Father for His amazing mercy and grace. But I really have faith
and I am sure that He who began a good work in me and you will bring it to completion until the until the day He returns.
Philipians 1:6.
Love in Christ, Carolyn
Thanks for your diary entry.
It sounds like you havea lot on your plate. I wish you the courage and srength you need to get through this difficult time.
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