SORRY I HAVNT BEEN ON BUT THINGS ARE CONFUSING RIGHT NOW AND I AM SO TIRED OF A LOT OF THINGS.I AM TRYING TO CRAM 8 LOST YEARS AND MAKE UP FOR IT ALL IN THE PAST CLEAN AND SOBER YEAR.                                                              I AM OVER   WORKED,WORRIED,ANGRY,CONFUSED,LOST AND TIRED!! I NEED MY READINGS,MEDITATIONS,MEETINGS AND A SOCIAL LIFE AND DONT TAKE THE TIME FOR ANY OF IT...HOW DO I STOP SOOOO MUCH OF EVERYTHING ELSE AND TAKE TIME TO SLOW DOWN FOR ME???BUT IF I LET UP ON OTHER THINGS I FEEL I AM NOT DOING MY JOB OR PROVIDING ENOUGH AND TAKING TIME AWAY FROM MY FAMILY.I AM ALSO SO STINKIN WORRIED ABOUT THE HEPATITIS C ,I GO BACK TO DOCS THE 3RD OF JUNE FOR LIVER BIOPSY AND THE TREATMENT OPTIONS.I FEEL REAL SICK SOME DAYS AND HAVE VERY FEW GOOD DAYS AND I CANT SLOW DOWN I NEED MY JOB AND THE HOURS,AND BE ON THE GO FOR MY FAMILY.THE TREATMENTS ALSO I HEAR SLOW YOU DOWN AND MUCH MORE !!!

I miss being on here I hvnt felt well lately been really sick and hard to get out of bed in the morn,And I been working a lot.I finally told work I need to lighten up a bit.I was working 6 dys. a week and doin a couple of doubles a week too.I go to docs june 3rd for biopsy and treatment options.I dont know what to do.I am scared of the treatments because my immune system is way down.I have been on a lot of antibiotics the past year and a half prescribed by clinic I am going to for regular doc.so, my gastro  specialist doc is running another test on my stool for infection and/or disease and over usage of antibiotics whatever that means.I am awaiting results now.

ITS A GREAT JOY TO BE HERE.IT IS AWSOME TO HAVE SUCH GREAT SUPPORT!!!THIS IS THE BEST SITE YET THAT I RAN ACROSS TO SHARE IT ALL AND ALSO TO HERE SUSSESS AND GREAT JOY AS WELL AS SHARING THE PAIN!

IT IS HARD FOR ME TO BARE EACH DAY!!!I AM IN A LOT OF PAIN AND I HAVE TO BE CAREFUL WHAT I TAKE CUZ THE HEPATITIS C.MY REGULAR DOC DOESNT PRESCRIBE NARCOTICS CUZ OF THERE PRACTICE LIMITS.IT IS A CLINICW/SLIDING FEE.MAYBE THE HEP DOC CAN HELP??? BUT WILL IT AFFECT MY TREATMENTS IF I GET THEM CUZ I AM SCARED TO DEATH TO GET THEM CUZ OF MY AUTOIMMUNITY.I AM NOT IN GOOD HEALTH NOW.HOW DO I DEAL WITH THIS PAIN???I CANT AFFORD A REGULAR DOC.

OH DEAR GOD HELP ME UNDERSTAND...HOW DO I HANDLE THIS FEAR.WHAT DO I DO I AM SCARED TO EVEN HAVE TREATMENTS FOR THE HEPATITIS C BECAUSE OF THE AUTOIMMUNITY DISEASE IN ME AND I AM ILL NOW COULDI WITH STAND THE TREATMENTS AND WHAT IF THEY DONT WORK......I DONT EVEN SEE THE DOC TIL JUNE 3RD I HATE THE STINKIN THINKIN AND I GIVE MY WORRIES TO YOU LORD,BUT WHY AM I STILL SCARED???