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No more crying!

I have a goal, I want to be tear free for at least a day. That is looking bleak at the moment. I need support from somewhere!

Pretending to change??

Mar 01 2011

Today was nice. We are still waiting to hear back about his apartment. He came home from work and did all the chores, including making dinner, but when I talked to him further about the movehe kind of shut down and did not want to talk about it. If every night could be like tonight and I knew he was changing for real I would let him stay, but I think it's a ploy to see if I will give in any let him stay. He drank again last night and lied to me about it. That was discouraging, I was upset, but I seem to be letting go of the anger a lot better than I have in the past. I guess I am finally adjuting to what may be coming in the future, the ultimate let down- him never changing. I will always love him and support him, but sometimes it is better to be apart. We will continue to work on it for now...and he IS still moving out.

Previous diary posts by JustJessie:

Almost March
Lots of crying today!
Tired
They admitted him!!
He stuck up for me

Day off
So far No good
Day One
Kind of Scared
Not too shabby

Comments (1) Add Comment

written by marriedtoit, March 01, 2011

Your story reminds me of Evangeline's here. You can love a person but refuse to be made to watch them self-destruct, or worse, force you to help them self-destruct. You are doing the right thing. If he wants to get stable, shows he is stable, stops self-medicating...he will do that and you two can start again. Until then, you are just being mean to yourself to stay with him.