|Mar 25 2012|
I just found out on Thursday that I'm going to be a mommy. My friend had bought be First Response (3 tests included). I took one at 7pm on Thursday, March 22nd. It was positive. I was shocked, scared and felt so lost. I took a picture and sent it to Whitney, Abby, and Lexy. I sat on the bed and just cried. That night I told the new daddy and he wasn't very supportive. He told me to get rid of it. As in abortion. That's not an option though. He did say that he would help the baby financially though but I'm pretty sure he will never be around to even want to see the baby. It hurts but I didn't expect much. I'm trying to take this the best way I can but it's really hard. I took the other two tests Friday morning and they were both positive.
Last night I was laying here crying talking to this guy I've had a crush on for awhile now. He asked me how I was doing and I said not so good but I didn't want to talk about it. He didn't push the subject, instead he called me. Not to ask what was wrong but just to talk and make me smile. He had no idea what was going on but he knew I needed a call and a laugh. I ended up telling him that I was pregnant. I was sure that he would have turned and ran but instead he laughed and asked: That's it? I was kind of offended but than he said: "I thought someone died. You're an amazing girl Cassie and you can do it and I'll be there every step of the way. I love kids." I almost cried. Here was this guy that just found out his crush of almost a year telling him that she was pregnant and he stepped up. The dad of the kid doesn't want anything to do with my baby but this guy is willing to take the place of the biological dad. I couldn't believe it. He than took out his guitar and just played. I laid on my bed listening to him play guitar and just sing and the world just felt right. Maybe this is how my life was suppose to be. I feel like I can do anything with him by my side.
So there goes my life. There goes the stupid drunk nights. Here comes my new life. Here comes a beautiful baby and a guy that might actually give a damn.
Brother in hospital
Obsession: Scale going down
7 weeks without cutting
Road to Recovery
The best part of me is him
Both of the roads have broken pavement
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