Diary Entries for tenged

Sooo Much to say...sooo tired to write it all...

tenged

Dear MJD friends,

Thank you all so much for the hugs--I APOLOGIZE profusely for being so absent & not returning them (I was inside). A great part of the last months hasbeen full of challenges with pieces of goodness, love & light. I will do my best to fill you in (message me if you desire details)...I exercised & improved my diet all summer (yoga & eating regular, healthy lunch) & I gained at least 10 pounds--I'm not used to my "new& [...]

email that I send my parents, bro & SIL last night with NO expectations

tenged

I will not be coming for Easter. With coming off of being this sick, it's far too much riding in the car for just a few hours & like the Sat. after Thanksgiving, will cripple me for days afterward. I'm way too sick otherwise (& tired all the time) to travel more than to & from a doctor appt. I don't feel like my own family cares about me & my physical decline in this past year. I'm doing so much reading & talking to people in [...]

Fucking perminant contagious germ maker

tenged

I'm so sick of this shit ass sickness!!!! I keep missing family get togethers! Back 3 1/2 years ago when I was 40, I made it to everything-my family; Dan's (thought it was our earlystages)--every holiday, inc VDay! Every BDay!!! I was on the outs with my family as they didn't accept him/us but his family welcomed me with open arms. That fall, when I had surgery, mine came to their senses & saw that this was a great guy! I was terrified but s [...]

Out with the old; in with the new

tenged

I haven't been on in a while as I've been quite ill due to a throat infection/cold. I'm prone & they hit me pretty hard.

Also a former "friend" emailed me telling me that she "forgave" me for "blowing off" her advances to get together/talk on the phone at the end of last summer. In that email full of "Christian love" & reminiscence of the good times (she perceived) we'd had in the late spring [...]

Tenny-Vet-yesterday

tenged

We had what should've been our traditional 2-week checkup yesterday (only 2 weeks overdue). It was very sad going as 2 weeks ago, Dan saw a report on the news & it was on the Net that1 of the techs was murdered by 1 of the former docs there. He had been gone from Maple Hills for a year, but what creeps me out is that HE treated both of my boys & both Dan & I liked him...*shudder* The tech was always sweet & would take Tenny back to x-ray & was always [...]

HUGE HUGS TO YOU ALL!!!

tenged

My dearest MJD friends,

I am so terribly sorry but I don't have the energy to hug you each individually & to tell you how very special you are to me & that your support has been immeasurable since I've been here (almost a year). You deserve every goodness there is & I wish you Blessings always!

Love,

Kim

So very depressed today

tenged

I did good these past 2 weeks; kept my eye dr appt last week (in rainy weather) & taxes yesterday. Last night though anxious I was ready (shaved & all) for my GYN appt with a new dr. I got no sleep--just the usual fibro shit. I woke up with a shooting pain in my lowe back--dammit! There went my "record". Of course I called & cancelled early, put heat on & by the time of my appt it was OK--I could've gotten it out of the way! I did [...]

Losing everyone takes its toll...

tenged

Yesterday, after waiting months to hear back from her, my former best friend from 20 years ago wrote me (after I sent her a simple "Why won't you write me?") I'll post her message& my response so I'm not redundant.

Why won't you write to me?

The following is about a vet (former) at the hospital where I take my boys & 1 of the sweet Techs who always took Tenny back for x-rays. It's so very upsetting knowing that a person you trusted could turn so evil.

tenged

Earlier tonight I asked Dan to marry me. It was out of the blue & stemmed from a conversation about sleeping together during Thanksgiving at my mom's. I was joking & said "wouldn't it be funny if we told them we were married & had the dogs--we'd probably get my old room b/c it's bigger. We could get a JOP & simple rings...then I started getting serious & I asked him, looking into his eyes." Who the hell would say no to that??? [...]

Sick, Anxious & Close to the "Edge"

tenged

Just to get y'all "caught up":

1. The vet hospital DID put me on a payment plan - though my card that I use to pay big vet bills' monthly payments increased (I'm smiling).

2. The boys have the most basic insurance now & I feel relieved.

3. Within the last 2 weeks, Tenny has been losing his fur; I'm not sure if it's a med side effect or stress.

4. Dan & I celebrated 3 years together..aaaaawwwwwww

[...]

A weird day

tenged

Dan was at an interview this am & it was just me & the boys. I had nothing (canceled Geddy's Bortadella shot for today) scheduled--felt too anxious after the argument yesterday to makean am appt. (but thankfully Dan & I are great again). And it was safe enough to reschedule. I played Book Worm for hours today--I love the challenge--got to 2,700,000 & lost the game late in the day. Dan got a job opportunity through his interview--thank God! We jus [...]