Why wear a ribbon?

"I wear the green/orange ribbon for PTSD, DID, Complex Trauma" (lfergie111)

MDJunction to me

"When I first came to MDJ, I was in need of peer support in dealing with issues of my childhood abuse. I was moving away from the painful issues and trying to find an uplifting group of people to help me transition to a thriver in my life. I found that here. I also found a group of peers with Fibromyalgia and found the same uplifting experience there. My computer crashed and it was a while before I found my way back, this time with issues related to Parkinson's Disease. I had tried a few other support sites before reminding myself of MDJ. On those, I never got a reply. I finally found my way back here and again found very supportive, caring and inspiring people who made me feel like I was 'back home'. Indeed I am." (ThereseML)

more testimonials

Memoir of an Insider

A look into the everyday life of a Woman trapped inside her own Mind.

As i dip my toes in..

May 22 2012

Describing life in the town i live in leaves a sour taste in the back of my mouth. If your ready to retire and want a cheap place to live, or if you are a merchant of illegal wares this is the townfor you. For me on the other hand this place is like a plastic bag/human relationship.

For the last 5 years i've been going to doctors telling them something is wrong. The responses i got were spirit breaking and pushed aside nonsense. The majority of Doctors here are uneducated and have ill bedside manors.

I am a walking medical case(or least thats how i see myself).

I have

Fibro,Chronic Fatigue,Agoraphobia,PSTD, Bi-Polar,Arthritis,Costochondritis, Emetophobia,

I have been Sexually, Mentally, Physically Abused. As well i am self-injurer, and spinal stenosis (smaller spinal canal) so most days i walk with a cane.

The more i write the more my anxieties worsen so i think ill end it here for now :)

Health Topics: PSTD, PSTD, selfinjury, selfinjury

Previous diary posts by DeslateFlwer:

Bewildered beauty

Comments (4) Add Comment

written by marike, May 23, 2012

I believe you need to get a proper doctor's opinion. Quite sure that medication will help. Meds have saved my life, and my relationships. I can have a normal life, despite my bipolar, depression and severe anxiety. Of course lifestyle is crucial... regular exercise, sleep, not isolating, hobbies, eating healthy, no drugs and little alcohol. I do know that these are very hard if you suffer from depression, thats why meds help. And of course regular therapy is important.

Have you got the option of taking action? Like moving to a bigger town? And get a job you love. Just by taking control you will already feel better.

Hang in there... I can relate to most of the things you have been through. And I have managed to regrets I used to have towards the people who did those things to me.

PM me anytime. Things do get better.

written by jstsIm, May 23, 2012

I understand that you are in fact "stuck" where you are at the moment! Agoraphobia by it's self will control where you are able to go! I too am stuck where I don't want to be...My hometown, where I have lived for 56 years and know no one! This isolation being so complete, that the only friends and family I have are here! Don't lose HOPE...lean on others as you need to, find strength from those who also struggle, and let them help you gain some solid ground under your feet! It takes time, precious time that seems to just pass us by! There is help here, you just have to reach out and grab it! HUGZ HONEY!
Reba

written by lovespeonies, May 25, 2012

You in good company here. So many people share so many of the conditions, disorders, and trauma you have been through there is never any reason to feel alone again.just pop in here and journal or post, pm etc. You can always send me a pm if you need to talk.

written by DeslateFlwer, May 29, 2012

it does help me inside to know that i'm not fighting these battles alone. I just feel so alone in my home world. I am to shy to just start posting to other people and such. i keep deleting things i'm writing in nevousness that i am blabbing on.