feeling very angry

I just need to write my feelings because I feel I have no one to talk to around me. No one would understand. My view of the world is very pessimistic right now. My mother just yelled at me for not mailingher this prescription today and to tell you the truth I didn't because I was hungover and slept till three today. I woke up and watched the new with my father and can't help but be angry because I just don't understand why we have to live in this fucked up world. This world of child prostitution and torture. The worst part is there are no answers, nothing is certain. Most people would tell me turn to God, but I am just now strong enough to have faith in something that is not certain. I guess that's what faith is, believing in God even though we can't see him or hear him. I'm sorry, but that's  just not enough for me. I have been praying for years for help from God and still live in this nightmare and my problems are hardly as bad as being born with no face, arms, or legs like I have seen. People will say, beauty comes from with in. Yeah there is beauty within, but who would want to marry someone with no face or with a horrible condition such as harlequins disease? Looks are important to people and anyone who says they are not is lying. So, why am I talking about this? Because it just shows that life is cruel and that it's not fair that we have to live here. People say life is a gift but I strongly beg to differ. Is life a gift for a person born horribly disfigured and in enormous pain? I don't think so. So I am just angry and bitter about life whatever it is and wish there was some concrete answer the my existential questions.