Looking for Peace of Mind

I finally got back on my meds. I saw my family doc and she was nice enough to give me a prescription to hold me over until I see my shrink. I'm on my regular schedule but my body hasn't adjustedyet. So, I still have suicide thoughts, self-injury, anger, screaming all going on in my head. I can feel how tense my muscles are and it is a little scary. I think I was starting to get to the point where the slightest noise no matter how pleasant it was driving me insane.

I found the above pic and I thought it was a great shot to use to update my do. My hair is in the "in between" stage. It needs to be refined. I need to be refined. I've been working out but there hasn't been much of a change. I think I need to step things up. I've been working out but nothing to where I am getting my heartrate up. I was doing pretty good when I was using that DVD I had. That seemed to do really well. i might want to use it along with the Self Magazine program. I still want to be able to run three miles. I did it before I want to be able to do it again. Again, my goal is to get myself in better shape than I was before I started taking that damn birth control shots. I want to finally get that part of my life back. I want to do it for me because I know I felt so confident, beautiful, healthy, strong, and energetic. I am eager to get back to that. I'm tired of looking in the mirror and seeing roles , of not being as flexible as I was because there is just too much mass in the way. I will get back to that!!!!!