Today stared off rather rough I'm afraid.  Going down to the cafe at work to get a cappuccino and spilling it all over my hands because I had an anxiety attack and my hands started shakingreally bad like the always do when I get tense.  So I got coffee, and hot coffee at that, all over my hands and kept spilling it on my hands until I set the bloody thing down finally leaving them nice and read but thankfully not to bad, though they did hurt like a sumbitch for a while after.

 Then around 11 or so I swung WAY up, I was still depressed mind you, but I was about ready to jump out of my skin.  My friend at work looked at me all worried and I just laughed her off and blurted out that I was fighting the urge to just run in circles around the office.  I had to move I had to move I had to move I had to move.... but I had to work at my desk.  So there I was, tapping my feet, moving my legs, playing with the toys on my desk, something, anything to get this huge burst of giddy energy out and it went on for hours, in fact until just shortly ago.

 I went to the doc who raised my meds... which I wanted her to do because I've had about 2-3 weeks of depression straight until earlier this week.  I knew a while ago they needed to be upped, so it's a relief I suppose that they're up, but my energy skyrocketed in the office with my doc when I was talking.

 BOOM

 Mile a minute, talking with my hands, using noises instead of words because I couldn't find the one I wanted....

 And now here I am... the calm after the store and just... blah.  It's like I used all my energy for the day and there's nothing left.  I feel dull and empty.

Ugh....