|Apr 02 2012|
I don't know what to do with myself. I never called my father back when he called for my daughter's birthday, I didn't speak to him when he happened to be at church (he gave me a hug andI just sort of tolerated it with a generic smile, not sure how else to act, you know?) and I am positive that my husband was perfectly clear that he would not be seeing him again. It's like my dad pretends that none of this has happened. Life goes on. He drops little hints about missing us and the kids (ESPECIALLY the kids!) and I can just imagine how much it pains him that I'm not allowing his perfect grandpa act right now. Anyway, he left a message a couple days ago saying the whole family were invited to tea tomorrow. He's getting more desperate, because he left the same invite on facebook. He never uses facebook. I'm tense because I can't help thinking that his next step will be showing up at my house and I don't know how to handle it. Hand him the breakup letter without a word and shut the door? Defend myself? I don't see this going well for me. I don't know what to do. My kids will be there, they know I'm avoiding him and that he's done some not-good things but when they see him they just light up. He's Grandpa to them. He's good at picking moments when I'm caught off-guard, he brings up these really bad family issues in public all the time when he knows I won't discuss the truth and I'll just say whatever I can to alleviate the pressure.
I'm honestly curious as to what he's thinking right now. That if he pretends it didn't happen that it will become my reality? Oh, the joys of having a narcissistic father.
Anyway. My mom is all moved out. We will all retreat now to lick our emotional wounds...and then everything will be freshly opened on Easter. I remember loving holidays. What happened to that? Can I get that back?
What am I looking for? I don't know.
Don't want to pick myself up
MDJ Tech Difficulties?
blah blah blah...
He wrote her a letter
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