Well, it has been three months since I saw my doctor.  This isn't because I don't want to go back.  It isn't because I have no need to go back.  It is because I just can't seem to get in!

My second appointment was not scheduled when I needed it scheduled.  I told them that the doctor wanted me in one week after my test results came back.  They said too bad, she was booked.  Okay, what can I say.  I took the next appointment.

The day of my appointment they called to tell me that I better call before I leave the house.  11 people are ahead of me and the doctor isn't there yet.  So I call before I am ready to leave (about 1:30) and they say sorry, she still isn't in.  Call back at 4:00.  I am ready to cry.

If you remember, my last appointment last for hours and hours.  I didn't get home until 8:00 at night (if I remember correctly).  So leaving first at 4:00 sound terrible.  I am getting very stressed and my head is pounding.

Then, at 3:45, they call to cancel my appointment.  The doctor is sick and can't make it.  I understand.  Doctors get sick too.  We reschedule for the 24th at 1:00.

The 24th rolls around and it occurs to me that I never got my confirmation phone call.  Worried, I call to make sure we are still going according to schedule.  That is when I am informed that they have no appointment for me!  What?!  They canceled me and rescheduled.  I have it written down.  Why don't they?

I was so upset I just hung up.  I guess it is time to find a new doctor.  I knew finding a good doctor was too good to be true. 

I am not seeing a huge improvement.  If I'm not having a really bad day, the meds seem to help.  The hard part is waiting eight hours before I can take the next dose!  Seems likethey wear off after only six hours.  That means two hours of misery.

 I got three of the 12 blood tests done.  My doctor wanted me tested for Lupus (ANA), Epstein Barr (EBV) and Parvo.  I had to laugh when I saw Parvo on the list.  I thought that was a dog disease.  I DO spend a lot of time with my dog. lol

After some research, I found that it is totally different from the dog disease.  No, you can't catch Parvo from your dog. :)  I don't have the results back yet, but at least things are moving along. 

 I nearly had a heart attack when they told me what I had to pay.  I had called the day before to find out if I could even afford to go with no insurance.  They said $127.  Hey, I can do that! :)  Then I went and had the blood drawn.  The lady said $521.  I almost cried right there.  She apologized  and said she had mis-read the book the day before.  So I paid $250 and will owe them the rest. 

 Still have nine more tests to go.  Wish I could just do them now and get it over with.

I am beginning to feel like getting help for this pain was a mistake.  This is turning into a mess.

I emailed the main office of the pharmacy that refused to fill my prescription to complain.  Yesterday, late afternoon, the pharmacist called me to apologize and he said he would be happy to fill my prescription.  I was so glad and felt like I did the right thing to complain.

 Today, my husband stopped at that store for something else and happened to talk to the store manager who he knows due to his work.  She said that she found out the pharmacy doesn't have to fill any prescription.  Like a liquor store, they can refuse service to anyone for any reason.  She was very annoyed that I had caused them trouble by complaining.

 He told her that the point was, he LIED when he said it was illegal to fill it.  She didn't seem to care and was still irritated.  She also said something about a miscommunication between the pharmacist and my doctor.

 Now I feel bad.  So did he deny me because he thinks I am a drug addict?  What other reason would he have?  Is this how it is going to be?  Just because I finally decided to get help for the pain, I am a drug addict?  I can't have people thinking that.  What will that do to my kids?

 I guess I never should have tried to get help.  I should just suck it up and deal with it.  Maybe I should just get all my meds through mail order.  Then no one will now what I am doing.  

I have never been a secretive person.  I never had a reason.  I am careful to do things right; I'm almost fanatical about it.  I hate when anyone breaks the rules.  I get mad when my husband goes in the business lane at the bank drive-through to cash his check.  I carefully count my groceries before using the express lane.  I like to follow the rules so I don't have to worry about not having a clean conscience.

All of this has me very upset. 

One of the prescriptions I needed had to be ordered.  My doctor said to take it in the mornings because it would give me some energy to get through the day.  I have been anxiously waitingfor it because I would LOVE to have some energy again.

Well, the pharmacist called me yesterday afternoon and said to come get the prescription, they couldn't fill it.  I asked him why in the world could they not fill a prescription.  He aid he called my doctor and asker her why she prescribed it.  She told him it was for fibromyalgia/CFS.  

He said that, by law, that particular drug is only approved for people with ADD so I can't have it!  Wow!  Can they do that?

It seems to me that doctors give meds for unapproved uses all the time.  So what is the deal?  I have a friend who gets a men's prostate med for her bladder problems.  It isn't for women but her doctor gives it to her because it works. 

I am a little mad right now but I guess it is their job.  Guess I'll have to call the doctor and see if there is something else she wants to give me. 

I think I am seeing a bit of improvement.  I don't hurt as bad today.  I'm very surprised too because I went on a cleaning spree yesterday after my husband made the comment that itdoesn't matter if I can't sleep; it is a problem when he can't because he works.  Yes, I was mad.  I work too, I just work from home.

But back to the subject. I had two percocet during the day. I didn't take any at bedtime.  I just took a Flexeril and some Advil PM.  I slept fairly well but I still feel tired. :(  But at least my pain is better today.  I don't know if I am just having a good day or if it is the pills, but whatever it is, I'll take it.  I have lots of work to do.  Even though I don't work according to him. ;)

Well, I got four of my five prescriptions for fibromyalgia and migraines filled yesterday.  By the time we got home I was hurting so bad.  I was a little bummed too because my husband waslooking at wheel chairs for me.  I didn't cry in front of him because I know he means well.  I think it scares him when I can hardly walk through the grocery store.  I used to always walk way ahead of him because I have long legs.  Now I have to keep reminding him to slow down.

Anyhow, I was hurting so bad I thought I would start by trying the percocet --the generic version.  My doctor told me to take one along with four Advil or ibuprofen or whatever I take. 

I was a little afraid to take it because I didn't know how I would react to it.  I know the low-lifes around town sell percocet on the street so I almost feel scummy taking it.  Well, it isn't as great a pain killer as I had hoped. :(  To top it of, I couldn't sleep (worse than my usual inability to sleep).  This surprised me since it said that it may cause drowsiness.   

At nearly midnight my head was still pounding and my hip was screaming and I was ready to cry.  So I popped a couple Advil PM and finally went to sleep.

This morning I still hurt but I am always bad in the morning.  I don't know if I should try another or not.  I am pretty disappointed with it, but maybe it is one of those things that takes time. 

I'll wait a few days to start the other meds.  The doctor said not to start them all at once  in case of an allergic reaction.  What she actually said was "If your hair turns green and falls out we'll need to be able to determine which pill is the cause".  She is pretty funny. :)  I think I'm going to like her.