|Aug 11 2009|
I have not been keeping up with anything lately. Depression has been more at the forefront of my life.
The pain and sleepiness is ever present too. I have been without pain medications for at least 2 months now. That has not been too positive of an experience. There are some days when I so want to find something. The over the counter things do not cut the pain. I so wish they did. I keep sleeping through the time to go to the free clinic, always waking up after it has started and having no chance of getting a number. A friend of mine has been set up with a good doctor through them and is running tests and trying to see if they could fix her illnesses. I am thinking maybe to try to retest to make sure that there is not something else wrong with me. I have been asked repeatedly about whether I really have fibro. Considering that I was diagnosed in 1999 and was not really tested for things. I would like to be tested to make sure it is not something that I could have been having treated and feeling even a slight bit better
I made the mistake of letting a friend stay here while he was waiting for emergency housing. He has been on my very last nerve. I have little patience. But he is helping with dishes and food bill.
The hours at work have not been getting any better. Well maybe a bit. But whether you can not live on 16 hours in one week or 20 makes no difference . I have actually broken down and started looking though I am very terrified of interveiws and it usually shows through and I get turned down. God help me I am so dreading them.
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