Joleen

I have not been keeping up with anything lately.  Depression has been more at the forefront of my life.

The pain and sleepiness is ever present too.  I have been without pain medications for at least 2 months now.  That has not been too positive of an experience.  There are some days when I so want to find something.  The over the counter things do not cut the pain.  I so wish they did.  I keep sleeping through the time to go to the free clinic, always waking up after it has started and having no chance of getting a number.  A friend of mine has been set up with a good doctor through them and is running tests and trying to see if they could fix her illnesses.  I am thinking maybe to try to retest to make sure that there is not something else wrong with me.  I have been asked repeatedly about whether I really have fibro.  Considering that I was diagnosed in 1999 and was not really tested for things. I would like to be tested to make sure it is not something that I could have been having treated and feeling even a slight bit better

I made the mistake of letting a friend stay here while he was waiting for emergency housing.  He has been on my very last nerve.  I have little patience.  But he is helping with dishes and food bill. 

The hours at work have not been getting any better.  Well maybe a bit.  But whether you can not live on 16 hours in one week or 20 makes no difference .  I have actually broken down and started looking though I am very terrified of interveiws and it usually shows through and I get turned down.  God help me I am so dreading them.