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Kelti"MDJ has been a saving grace for me. It has taken from me that feeling of being so alone in the management of my Bipolar Disorder. I am not alone any more!! The friends on MDJ that I have made have kept me going. I am more at peace with myself now, thanks to all the people here on MDJ. I thank God for each one of them. MDJunction is the place of Hope." (Kelti)

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bluecontrary In this diary I want to be completely honest about my symptoms and daily struggles, which will give me insight for my PTSD to become more manageable.

Break Up

Jun 06 2010

My boyfriend and I broke up. He is a recovering alcoholic, and said that he needs to focus on his sobriety. I am in complete shock. We live together, I met his entire family, we have dogs together...I take care of his daughter, and have become a mother figure to her.

This happened last night after I expressed some concerns about his ex-wife. Since then I went to work, and he hasn't been home. I checked the online history and he has already looked for apartments.

I am utterly hurt, confused. I feel betrayed and sad. I love him very much. We were building a life together. We even talked about having children.

I have been talking to my friends who have been very supportive. They tell me it isn't my fault, which I know is true- but that doesn't make it hurt less.

I am still going to push through and look for affordable counseling for myself. I got into school for the fall, and I am also going to keep my attention on work as well.

I love him so much.

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